Wednesday, October 21, 2020

31 Days of Horror 2020 Day 21 Manos Returns

 

TITLE-Manos Returns

SOURCE-Amazon Prime Video

Yep this is a sequel to the cult classic Manos Hand of fate.  I had been hearing for what feels like 20 years about a sequel being made. Well I don't think this is the sequel I was hearing about. Cause the one I kept hearing about had Gene Snitsky,Former WWE wrestler,and Maria Caneles,another former WWE wrestler. Manos Returns has neither person.

We start off with a car with 4 people driving thru a rural area. I am guessing every one in the car is from Europe. Because everyone of them has a very odd sounding accent. They get stopped by the local sheriff,cause they have a taillight out. 

After that the car ends up at a old abandoned house. Which I'm assuming is the house from the first Manos film. Torgo shows up and the 4 people are now stranded at this house. The house appears to be full of women in white nightgowns.

Now this film was like 1 hour and 7 minutes and sucked so much it felt like it was 8 hours long. The acting was horrible. Many times your could see the actor's eyes going back and forth as they read the cue cards that were just off camera.

The tiny bit of gore was bad. It looked like something you would see in one of those Super 8 films the Polonia Brothers made when they were young teens. 

Whoever was in charge of the camera either wasn't bothering to look thru the viewfinder or just didn't care. Most of the shots in the film are framed badly. And not just "hey this could look better" badly. I'm talking about "OK who gave the blind guy the camera" bad.

Back to the acting. The four leads all are competing to see who can be the worst actor in the film. And it ends up a 4 way tie. Really the only person in the cast that appears to have any acting talent is Torgo. And he is ok at best.

Pretty much avoid this turd. Saw ,after the film was over,that a prequel to Manos is on Amazon Prime Video. I might give that a watch another day. I doubt it can be any worse than this steaming pile of donkey shit.

Manos Returns gets a F.