31 Days of Horror Movie 11

The Greenskeeper
2002
Echo Bridge 20 film Multipack DVD

Back in the early 2000s when most videos stores were clearing out all their VHS, I was hitting them and buying up any cheap horror VHS I found. Hollywood Video had a deal 10 VHS for 10 bucks. So I dug around and found 10. This one I grabbed because it was from Roger Corman's production company. Plus it looked like a comedy/slasher.

Allen is the assistant greenskeeper at a huge golf course. His father died years ago. And now his mom has remarried. Allen has a very annoying girlfriend and all he really wants to do is become an author. But there is someone killing members of the golf club.

Sure this is low budget. And very cheesy. But the comedy in the film makes up for the flaws. Plus there is some inventive kills. One guy gets killed by having his testicles placed in a ball washer. A couple gets killed using the tool they use to make the holes on the golf course.

Only two things make this film stand out. First former Atlanta Braves pitcher John Rocker plays the killer. And Kip Winger,from Winger, does all the music.

The Greenskeeper gets a C+.

Asshat Podcast Episode 13

Asshat Podcast episode 13

Nadia returns for a very funny episode of Asshat. We start off by sharing some Halloween memories. Trick or treating,past costumes,wild parties and stoners who gave us Spam instead of candy. Then the Asshat Movie of the week is another "classic" from Bill Zebub. Antfarm Dickhole, A film that couldn't possible live up to the promise of the title. And in the Media we have consumed segment we talk about a ISANE episode of Lock Up we watched recently. Nadia gives her quick thoughts on the series finale of Breaking Bad. And I talk about three movies I recently watched.

31 Days of Horror Movie 10

Friday the 13th
1980
Paramount Deluxe DVD

Now I figure most people reading this review know the plot of this film. The film that helped jumpstart the 80s slasher boom. Counselors are at a summer camp on a lake. They are killed one by one. At the end there is one lady left alive and she finds out who the killer is.

I have now owned this film 5 times. Got it on VHS back in the late 80s. Then sometime in the mid 90s bought the laserdisc. But both of those were the slightly cut version. The film got some minor trims to get an R rating in the USA. So in the late 90s/early 2000s I imported an uncut VCD. Paid way too much for what amounted to about 15 seconds of additional footage. In 2008 I bought the original release DVD for $5. Then finally 2 years ago got the four pack of the deluxe versions of the first 4 films extremely cheap. Finally I owned a nice looking copy of the fully uncut version. And this deluxe dvd is loaded with interesting extra features. We get an informative commentary with Sean Cunningham. A featurette on Sean. A so called Friday the 13th Reunion. The only extra that sucks is the "Lost tales from Camp Blood part 1". Which feels like some crappy fan film.

Now the Friday the 13th films seem to be the most popular slasher series for my generation. They have never been my favorite. That would be the Texas Chainsaw Massacre films. But I do enjoy the Friday films more than the Elm Street series or the Halloween series. The Friday films never try to be more than they are. They are just pretty much brainless gore films.

Friday the 13th gets a B-.

31 Days of Horror Movie 09

American Werewolf in London
1981
Universal Full Moon Edition DVD

I can still remember first time I saw this movie. It came on TV and I had loved werewolves since seeing the Universal classic "The Wolfman" back in the late 70s. Now the TV edit of course was missing lots of scenes. But still I fell in love with this film. And over the years I have owned it on many home video formats. Last year I found this loaded special edition DVD for $5. Or course I had to get it.

Two friends are backpacking across the UK. They stop in a pub and are told to not go out on the moors at night. But being dumb asses they don't listen. They are attacked by a werewolf. One of them dies. But the other survives. So the surviving guy becomes a werewolf. What makes this stand out is the friend that dies keeps appearing and over the course of the film is decomposing. Plus the transformation scenes are so well done. The first time I saw the lead guy turn into a werewolf I was shocked. This was nothing like watching Lon Chaney turn into a werewolf. I also love how the film is loaded with dark humor.

The DVD has a great commentary. Then also includes a very well done documentary about the making of the film. I think the documentary is as long if not longer than the film. Just the documentary alone is worth the 5 I paid for it.

American Werewolf in London gets a B+.

31 Days of Horror Movie 08

Ichi the Killer
2001
Media Blasters DVD

I had heard of this film for years. And thought I had seen it. Well one of the co hosts of my podcast  wanted to cover it on the next episode. So I sat down to watch it. After watching it I realized I had not seen it before.

The basic plot is the boss of a Yakuza gang disappears. His second in command starts looking for him. We find out that a brutal killer known as Ichi has killed this boss. The rest of the film is Karkihana looking for his missing boss. And Ichi killing people. The kills are all very bloody and gory. Now while I did enjoy this film, the pacing of it was kind of slow. There was plenty of scenes that had nothing really to do with the plot and could have been cut out. For every 5 minutes of entertaining stuff we get 10 minutes of slow stuff. There is plenty of pretty outrageous scenes. Kakihana cuts off the tip of his tongue. Ichi splits a guy in half top to bottom. We find out that the guy who is Ichi's boss has brainwashed him and been lying to him for a long time now. We never find out why this boss, named Jirii, wants this one Yakuza gang killed.Finally after almost 2 hours we get the confrontation we have been waiting on. Ichi vs Kakihana, which is the highlight of the film.

Ichi the killer gets a C+.

31 Days of Horror Movie 07

Staunton Hill
2009
Starz Channel airing

Read the on screen guide listing of this film and it sounded interesting. We get 5 college students hitchhiking through Virgina on their way to DC for some rallies. The truck they hitch a ride in breaks down. So they stay the night in an old barn.

The barn belongs to a crazy family of rednecks. And we get your typical backwoods redneck horror tropes. There is some ok acting and decent FX work. But the plot is by the numbers.

I didn't realize till the film was over that this was directed by George Romero's son Cameron. But early on in the film one of the college kids ask the rest of them if they have seen "Night of the Living Dead". That should have been a huge clue. While this wasn't a horrible film.Nothing about it stands out. Really glad I just caught this on TV and didn't rent or buy it.

Staunton Hill gets a C-.

Asshat Podcast episode 12

Asshat Podcast Episode 12

Longtime friend John makes his second appearance. We talk about comic books,action figures and cartoons. Then go long on all 5 films in the Return of the Living Dead films.

31 Days of Horror Movie 06

Carrie
1976
MGM Special Edition DVD

I first saw this film when  I was about 5 or 6. Before seeing it I didn't know who Stephen King was. But after watching this film I knew I wanted to read some of his books. Thankfully one of my older cousins had most of them and loaned them to me. And Carrie is still one of the best adaptations of a King novel to film so far.

Carrie White is a very sheltered young lady. Her mother is ultra religious and do all she can to keep Carrie from the outside world. The film starts off with Carrie in the showers after gym class. Her period starts and she has no idea what is going on. The other girls start throwing tampons at her. The gym teacher comes in and stops this. But Carrie is devastated by the events. The school lets her go home early. Carrie tells her mother about what happens. And the mom blames all of this on Carrie being full of sin.

One of the girls that was tormenting Carrie hatches a plan. She finds out that the BMOC has asked Carrie to the prom. So she lays a trap for Carrie. But the trap backfires and Carrie finally gets her revenge on all the people that have been mean to her.

I really enjoy this movie. Sissy Spacek is great as Carrie. And looks the part. Carrie is described in the book as being a strange looking young lady. And Sissy is strange looking. The rest of the cast are all pretty decent. The FX work is well done.  And I love some of the angles and camera tricks Brian Deplama does.

The DVD has two documentaries on it. Plus a featurette  on the musical based on the film. I wish it had a commentary. But I only paid $5 for it. Now since this came out over 30 years ago there has been a sequel. Which was decent. A made for TV remake. That remake kind of sucked. Angela Bettis was good as Carrie but the story was changed and watered down since it was made for TV. And in a week or so a second remake will be hitting theaters. With Chloe Moretz as Carrie White. No idea how it will be. But I think I am waiting for it to hit DVD before I see it.

Carrie gets a B+.

31 Days of Horror Movie 05

Antfarm Dickhole
2011
DVD

Been on  Bill Zebub kick recently. And had seen 4 of his films. Enjoyed them all. So one of my co-hosts and I decided to watch Bill's newest film for the Asshat Podcast.

We started watching it one night. But were both drunk and kept getting distracted. So 2 days later we sat down to watch it again. I was hoping my memory of it being shit was because I was drunk. I was wrong.

Some guy ends up with South American Soldier ants in his dick. Anyone that touches his cock gets attacked and killed by them. Now going in I was expecting a low budget, but still funny film. With at least 4 or 5 decent looking women. What I got was a low budget ,unfunny film , with no good looking women in it. The FX work was the worst I have seen in  a Bill Zebub film. This one didn't even have some halfway interesting subtext to keep me interested.

Antfarm Dickhole gets a D-.

31 Days of Horror Movie 04

Zombie Christ
2011
Stream

This is one of the more recent films from the prolific director Bill Zebub. Some druids bring Christ back to life. He is this jacked up skeleton. He goes around attacking faux-Suicide Girl looking women. A woman and this older man team up to stop Zombie Christ. The film is basically an excuse to show lots of naked women. Most of the women are really attractive. A few of them are way too thin. But at least 75% of them are pretty hot.

If you have never seen a Bill Zebub film, this is a good one to start with. It is jammed packed with good looking women, lots of comedy and just absurd situations. Like when Zombie Christ rapes a nun with a chicken leg. I doubt the film had a budget bigger than $1000. And it shows. But still if you like low budget horror this is worth watching.

I recently did a long indepth review of this film on my podcast.
Asshat Podcast Episode 11

Zombie Christ gets a B.