The Toy DVD

 

TITLE-The Toy

SOURCE-Full Screen DVD

It is odd what sticks in my memory. I sometimes forget the month or year. But got clear memories of going in 1982 with my parents and the neighbors to see The Toy at the movie theater near the mall in Mobile AL.  Then about a year or so after that new video rental store opens in town,we already had 2 in town that we were members of,and we go and rent The Toy. So After school one day Mom wasn't home yet,Dad got off at 5pm and was never home before 6pm,I invited a pile of the local kids over and we watched The Toy. 

And that rat bastard Lil Colon,yes he was Colon Jr so got called Lil Colon(also his last name was Brown...) told his mom about the part when the robot dog pisses on Richard and the nude painting of Gleason's wife. His mom comes over chews out my mom and I catch shit.

All of that clear in my memory and it was 83 so 42ish years ago. Then when I put this DVD in a few weeks ago I remembered almost nothing of the film. 3 scenes tops.

This is a remake of a 70s French film,Richard Pryor is Jack/Jackie Brown. A vet that is about to lose his home to taxes. His lady is a lawyer for Klan Watch,a civil rights group. He is told by his buddy at the bank if he had "A real job" the bank would extend the time he had to pay the back taxes. Pryor is a writer and wants to work for the big newspaper. Which is ran along with most other places in Baton Rouge Louisiana back then by U.S. Bates. 

U.S. Bates is an older delisional white guy. Who pretty much puts himself first ahead of all others. Became rich by being born into the money and running shady schemes to get richer. And has dreams of getting into Politics.

Pryor puts his name down as Jackie Brown,to maybe  get a job as cleaning staff at a big party at Bates' mansion. Gets hired to do that and work a few nights a week cleaning the big department store Bates has. 

The party is a disaster.Pryor is dressed up in a maids outfit. Dumps the meal in Bates lap and gets told to "Shave that mustache and you are fired".

Pryor the next night is cleaning the department store late at night,right when Bate's young son is coming into town. The kid lives at a military boarding school. Only coming home for 1 week a year. He is told he can  have anything in the store,by Ned Beaty(who is a weasel like underling for US Bates). Young Master Bates,and yes that joke is made,sees Pryor being his normal comedic self and tells them "I want that" 

So  needing lots of money fast Pryor agrees  to come stay at the mansion and be young Master Bate's living toy for a week. 

Young  Master Bates is played by Scotty Schwartz,who was Flick in A Christmas Story. Thinking  this is his first role. He is good as the asshole kid that just wants some attention from his dad.

After having too much of Scotty's pranks and just being a general asshat,Pryor leaves goes home. Then middle of the night a drunk as fuck Ned Beatty shows up. With a check for 10k,the amount Pryor needs to save his house. All he has to do is come back and stay until Scotty goes back to boarding school.

Pryor comes back, lets the kid know he aint taking any shit. And talks Scotty into doing a free newspaper called The Toy. The paper will be all about US Bates. They start interviewing the various butlers,maids an chauffers  that have worked for US Bates for years and learn he won the butler in a pool game. And various other shady deals.

The published their paper and US is up in arms. But sees that his son is happy. 

This cast,wow this cast. Jackie Gleason isn't given much to work with as US Bates. Stories are the stuff he would say and stories he would tell between takes was funnier than this film. Richard Pryor has said he really enjoyed working with Gleason. 

Of course as an 8 year old kid when I first saw this lots of the jokes went over my head. Now I of course I get them. I had been wanting to re-watch this for a long time. Never seems to be streaming on any service I got. So finding the DVD for a buck or so I was happy. 

Load it up,fucker is Full Screen. Ok it's a comedy I can deal with that. THen 20 minutes before the ending it starts skipping and pausing. FUCK. Clean the disc and yea appears disc rot....Want to see the ending. Go look Amazon Prime Video has it for 5 bucks. Got 3 bucks amazon credit. So 2 bucks out of pocket I now own it digitally.

The film has this odd is it for kids nah it isnt for kids shift often. The interactions between Pryor and Scotty are totally 80s made of kids movie stuff.  It is rated PG,but this is early 80s when PG wasn't like now. 

Never noticed before Richard Donner directed this. Yea Lethal Weapon 1,2,3 Richard Donner.

The Toy is one where if you saw it as a kid or back when it came out I can see you having nostalgia for it and wanting to see it again. The DVD and Blu ray are both out of print.  Used copies of the DVD are still cheap,undder 10 bucks. The Blu ray starts at 30 bucks and goes up from there. I am happy with the buck or so I paid for the partially working  DVD and then 2 bucks for the digital copy.

The Toy gets a C+

Bikini Carwash Company Blu ray

 

TITLE-Bikini Carwash Company

SOURCE-MVD REWIND Blu Ray

Never thought I would see this film on Blu ray. Much less one with a commentary. Bit of history. When cable finally made it to the backwoods community I grew up in it was 1990. I was working part time. So while my parents were happy to  pay for cable,going from 6 to 8 channels on a good day to 30 was mind blowing to them,I was the one that said Hey I will pay the 20 bucks a month they want so we get Showtime and The Movie Channel, Yea this tiny company (Rural Cable vision) only offered Showtime,TMC and Disney Channel as premium channels. At 10 each a month.

Quickly I learned about Joe Bob Briggs show on TMC. I would set my vcr to record it. Then one week he got a 5 night event on Showtime. Each night he showed a different Emmanulle movie. And not the Sylvia Kristel ones. This was Laura Gemser and all the other bootleg Emmanuelles. I had an 8 hour vhs that I recorded each of this 5 night event on. And the final night after the Emmanuelle film ended Showtime aired the R rated cut of Bikini Carwash company and my tape got this too. 

I had no clue. That tape sat in a box for years. I was tape trading a few years later and someone wanted that Fridays Joe Bob airing of Emmanuelle 4,the COrman cut of the film with Monique Gabrielle,and after it ended I let the master tape keep playing and saw Bikini Carwash Company. 

Watched it all and found a film that was dumb and funny. A film where over half the running time feels like music videos shot for Hot Rocks on Playboy Channel. But a film I would put on sometimes just cause it was so dumb.

The nephew of the car wash owner is called to Califorina from the mid west,I think it was Iowa. He gets dropped off at the beach and is trying to find the car wash. Ends up running into our leads,who have just had all their packs of edible bikinis melt in the heat. They sell him one as "California Gumbo" and tell him how to get to the car wash.

The Uncle is sick. Nephew has to run the place and sees it is about  to go under. Gets talked into hiring the California Gumbo Ladies to wash cars in bikinis. Saves the business. But a local politician wants to shut them down on  moral decency grounds.

All the while a flasher is running around showing his dong to people.

This all converges in the last 20 minutes before we get one final MUSIC VIDEO set to a song from some forgotten glam rock band.

Being on Blu ray this of course looks better than my copy on that 8 hour VHS tape. From what I have read online it is the unrated cut. The music videos now are a bit longer and include some shots that were not on that SHowtime airing. 

Heard this is an AI Upscale and sometimes the backgrounds look a bit smeary. The sound was decent. It is revealed on the commentary,cereal at midnight host talks to Jim Wynorski,that this was filmed on 16mm and then edited on tape. 

Really this is a niche release for a niche audience. Those of us that remember when it was a big deal cause Hardbodies was playing on HBO that weekend. 

Bikini Carwash Company Blu ray gets a B-

Update

 Ok Dad's surgery went fine. I will have at least 2 things up here in June. Hoping by July I will be able to get back to at least 1 post every 7 or 8  days.

Hey folks

 So when this post appears I should be getting home from the hospital. My father is 81 and having  his left knee replaced.

Which means for most of June I will have little free time. I will try my best to stick to my 4 posts a month on the blog here. But it might not happen. 

Thx to all that read my posts

Fist Fight Blu ray

 

TITLE-Fist Fight

SOURCE-Blu Ray

Been a huge Ice Cube fan since that first NWA album came out. When he left I followed him and over the years had every album he has put out. Saw him live back in the mid 90s. But his acting career I haven't followed that closely.

But when you are out at yardsales and blu rays are 50 cents I will take a chance on most anything. So grabbed this thinking ok I will watch it months from now. 

Two days after buying it put it in when I needed some laughes and wow this provided.

Ice Cube and Charlie from Always sunny are teachers at a high school. Rumor is there is funding about to be cut so some teachers will get fired. It is the last day of school and the Seniors are pulling pranks.

No student is brave enough to prank Cube,a no nonsense History teacher. But one kid grows some balls. Using his smartphone to act as a remote control for the old ass Tube tv with VCR on  a rolling cart. Now Pretty sure this won't work. Secondly what schools in 2016 had those vcr/tube tv/cart things anymore. Even the shitty schools by me got rid of them by 2000.

Cube grabs a fire ax and destroys the students desk. Instead of lying about it Charlie rats out Cube and gets told "I'm gonna fight you after school." So the rest of the film is Charlie trying to get out of this fight,avoid the various pranks the kids set up. And trying to get ready for his daughter's talent show.

The fight finally happens and it is a brawl. Going all over the school. Charlie gets to the talent show,driven by Cube. They keep their jobs and at the end appears all is good.

Sure this is nothing amazing. It is really the chemistry between Cube and  Charlie that makes this work.

Fist Fight gets a B-

American Ninja DVD

 

TITLE-American Ninja

SOURCE-MGM DVD

I was sure I saw this back after it hit home video. Nope cause I remembered nothing of it when watching it the other day. Guessing I saw part 2.

Joe Armstrong is a Army soldier. He has no memory of his life from about 10 years before now. But he is a skilled Ninja. 

Start of the film a car with the General's daughter gets attacked by criminals. Oh yea this Army base is in the Philipines. The daughter is played by the brunette lady from Weird Science. Not not Kelly Lebrock this is Julie Aronson. She was in a Friday the 13th and I have noticed her popping up in lots of 80s films.

But anyways the car is attacked but thankfully Joe AMERICAN NINJA Armstrong is nearby to save her. He uses his ninja skills to dodge bullets and kick ass. 

They escape and he gets her back to the base. He gets in trouble. End up fighting the kung fu guy from I'm gonna get ya Sucka. After beating him they become best friends. 

This entire film is insane. Armstrong has agility above what a human could do. And it appears that some times he has Ninja Magic like this is the old Sega Shinobi arcade game.

If I had seen this when it came out as a pre teen I would have loved it. Seeing it now as a adult I love it but for totally different reasons. This feels almost like a bigger budget version of all those Godfrey Ho cut and paste Ninja movies. All Armstrong needs is a headband that says Ninja and the Garfield phone.

Not many 80s action movies can compare to the insanity and just pure,i'm betting cocaine fueled,wackiness of American Ninja. I totally see why this spawned a franchise. Rumor is Chuck Norris got offered the lead and refuses cause his face would be covered for the last third of the movie. I want to believe it was because Chuck wasn't bad ass enough to be AMERICAN NINJA!

American Ninja gets a A-

Hellblazer Tainted Love TPB

 

TITLE-Hellblazer vol 7 Tainted Love

SOURCE-Vertigo TPB

Hellblazer is a title I read off and on for most of it's run. Been trying to get the full run in TPB form and working my way thru the TPBs I have.

This is part of the Garth Ennis(Writer) and Steve Dillon(Penciler) run. Which besides Jamie Delano's runs is the best.

John has met back up with Kit. They move in with each other. He celebrates his 40th birthday and after that all goes to shit. Kit leaves him to head back to Ireland. John gives up and becomea  drunk living on the streets.

Still you got the Hellblazer touches. Like Archangel Gabriel showing up and losing his heart. Or the vampire storyline where thanks to something from previous issues John defeats an ancient vampire. One that has been around a long time. 

Ennis and Dillon blend words and art so perfectly in this. And even coming into the middle of a long storyline I didn't feel lost.

Yea I know the Keanu film isn't that loved. It is ok. The TV Show was amazing but so few saw it. Seems the only way to get the true form of John Constantine is in vol 1 of Hellblazer.

Hellblazer Tainted Love gets a A.

Captain America The Ghost Army OGN

 

TITLE-Captain America The Ghost Army

SOURCE-Marvel Comics/Scholastic Books

Written by Alan Gratz and drawn by Brent Schoonover this is a untold tale of Cap back in World War II. Over in Europe with Bucky,after fighting a bunch of ghosts of dead soldiers,our duo learn of the US Ghost Army. A troop of 10 or so soldiers that use various devices and tricks to make it seem like they are a huge army. Like huge speakers playing soldiers marching.

We also learn that Baron Murdo is here. Helping his grandfather aid the Nazis. That ghosts of dead soldier Cap fought,they are cause of Murdo's Ghost Machine. Which he wants to use to bring Dormamu to Earth.

Full of action and a few twists and turns this is a OGN made for the younger readers. Which is why Scholastic was co publisher. 

Gratz writes a story that is easy to follow and also from what I remember of Cap's WWII years this doesn't contridict anything. Plus the ending is a nice way to possibly get more books. With us seeing Murdo heading to meet the Ancient One. And another character heading to Wundogore Mountain.

Captain America The Ghost Army OGN gets a B.

Daredevil Born Again Marvel Premier Collection TPB

 

TITLE-Daredevil Born Again

SOURCE-Marvel Premier Collection TPB

Ahh Born Again the Frank Miller and David Mazzucchelli Daredevil run that is now becoming the newest season of the Daredevil TV show. And I'm guessing that show is why I found this TPB from 2024 in a local Walmart. Couldn't pass it up for 15 bucks.

I was 11 when Daredevil vol 1 #227 came out. I had read most of Miller's first run on DD. But by this time I was deep into other Marvel titles and a few indie books. Thankfully the comic shop owner talked me into adding Daredevil back to my pull list. 

Sat down the day after buying this TPB and unlike most comics I didn't just toss it into a stack and leave it unread for months/years. Nah those first 3 pages of issue 227 caught my attention and about an hour later I had read Born Again for the first time since I'm guessing 2003.

So what is Born Again? This was when  Frank Miller decided to revamp Daredevil. He lost everything,his law firm,his license to practice law,his home. Lost it all. And all because his old girlfriend Karen Page had sold him out. She had moved out west years before to do movies. Ended up doing adult films. Got on drugs and in the first 3 pages we see her desperate for a fix. Telling her dealer "I know Daredevil's real name" handing this man this info. Then over the course of a week seeing this info make it's way up the chain to Kingpin. A man  who wants to destroy Daredevil. And armed with this info will do that.That first issue ends with Matt Murdock at his now blown up home. Holding the tattered remains of his costume. 

The next issue titled Purgatory has Matt going and confronting Kingpin getting beaten almost to death. Then placed in an old car and thrown into the river. He escapes barely. And Kingpin finds out the car was found but no body in it. Which haunts him.

3rd issue has Matt homeless living with the bums in the alleys. He gets knifed by a guy in a Santa outfit. Ben ,a repoter at the Daily Bugle that knows Matt is Daredevil,is told to not investigate the Kingpin's war on Matt Murdock. After the knife attack a badly wounded Matt ends up being taken to the care of Sister Maggie.

4th issue Karen makes it back to NYC,thanks to a dealer that takes an interest in her. Ben after having his life threatened almost kills the story on Kingpin. Kingpin has a Daredevil costume made for a violent mental patient. And Matt learns Sister Maggie is his mother. Who he had been told died when he was born.

Issue 231 has Matt fighting the fake Daredevil in a brutal fight for a code approved comic in the 80s. Ben keeps working on his story which almost cost his wife her life. And a somewhat happy ending with Matt and Karen re-uniting.

232 Karen kicks heroin. And Kingpin uses his connections to bring in the semi failed experiment on the Super Soldier project,this time a Nam era soldier known as Nuke. Who is a upper addict and being used by a black ops group to go fight battles the US proper can't be in. Sent to Hell's Kitchen this super soldier might be more than Daredevil,who is just healed from the beating in the second issue,can handle.

233 is just perfect. The Avengers show up and take care of Nuke. Daredevil delivers Nuke to Ben's desk at the Bugle and a few people that helped Kingpin take down Matt Murdock flip on Kingpin. Sure Kingpin will not do time but he lost a major amout of power. We end with Matt and Karen in Hell's Kitchen celebrating they made it through all this alive.

If it was just those issues ,and they are recolored,it would be worth the 15 bucks. Nah we get more. We get layouts from Mazzucchelli. Then the complete script to issue 233. Plus the covers of all the TPB collections of this. Every cover in this collection without the logos and stuff.

Just a loaded collection. Sure it is a tiny bit smaller in height and width than a normal TPB. Still for this cheap price it is worth grabbing.

Daredevil Born Again Marvel Premier Collection TPB gets a A.

The Dream Team DVD

 

TITLE-The Dream Team

SOURCE-Universal DVD

Talk about a forgotten comedy. Might be it got overshadowed by Keaton's other big hit in 89,some film called Batman,might just be this wasn't as big as I thought it was.

Michael Keaton is a pathological liar and has anger issues, which means he has spent the last year or so in a Mental Hospital in New Jersey. His therapy group has Peter Boyle,who thinks he is Jesus,Christopher Lloyd,a neat freak that believes he is a doctor at the hospital and Steven Furst ,who only speaks in TV soundbytes. Their doctor arranges for them to go see a baseball game in NYC. But on the way they stop for Furst to take a piss break.  I know the feeling when ya gotta piss you GOTTA PISS.

While in an alley for Steven to piss,the doctor sees to corrupt cops kill someone. Doctor gets knocked out and taken to a near by hospital. Listed as John Doe. Furst gets back to their van but can't explain to them what happened.So you got 4 mental hospital patients loose in NYC and the wacky hyjynx start. 

Keaton of course is the lead. And I sometimes forget he was always great in comedies. For me though Boyle and Lloyd steal the movie. One scene has the four going into the  hospital to see their doctor. Boyle is dressed up like a nurse. Sees a man laying on a gurney in the hallway "You are healed my son. Get up and walk" Boyle tells him. They keep passing by and in  the background you can see the man attempt to stand and just fall flat to the floor.

Lloyd has a great scene where he goes to visit his wife and daughter. Both of whom he hasn't talked to since he went to the hospital. All thru out the film Lloyd has a clipboard with him. Won't let anyone touch it. But when his daughter asks for it to put her drawings on you can see him struggle to let it go but he does.

Of course our group saves the day. The corrupt cops get taken down. And all ends well. With Keaton even meeting back up with an ex-girlfriend.

While the premise is nothing but that part from Once Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest,when Jack takes the guys out for a day in the city,just expaneded to a full length movie. What makes this stand out is the casting. While Keaton,Lloyd and Boyle are still remembered for how great they are/were,Steven Furst is forgotten.. Back then he was a bigger name cause of St Elsewhere.

The dvd looks decent sounds good. And it is an older DVD release. The extras are a trailer and a few TV spots. I do know this has a blu ray release and I plan on  tracking it down soon.

The Dream Team while not even in the top 10 comedies from the 80s is still worth seeing.

The Dream Team gets a B-.