Movies to avoid 1

The worst movies ever

Passport video

I knew something was fishy when this documentary of the 50 worst movies ever made had a run time of 1 hour. And damn I was right. Alot of the time they spend at most 30 seconds on a movie. And usually they barely tell why this film is one of the worst ever. Another big gripe is they inculde Jack Hill's Spiderbaby on the list. This late 60s horror movie,starring Lon Chaney Jr and Sid Haig,is one of the unsung classics of the horror genre. I had seen this dvd on the shelves many times and almost have bought it. Thankfully Netflix had it and it wasn't even worth a Netflix rental. Avoid at all cost.

A sidenote I think I have come down with the flu. So I doubt I will be updating much the next week or so.

Why isn't this better known 01

The Tick Luny Bin Trilogy issues 0-3

story and art by Eli Stone

This is the second storyline in the Tick series by Eli Stone. The Tick is hypnotized and returns to the Evensville clinic. Which is a mental hospital he escaped from in the first issue of the Ben englund Tick run. When he gets there the evil doctor that worked with the Tick during his first stay there tries his best to convince Tick that he is a normal person and should give up his superhero gig. While this is happening Arthur goes and recruits M.O.A.V,the mystic order of arachnid vigilante, to help him bust the Tick out. The membership of M.O.A.V. is made up of the other patients of Evensville that escaped at the same time Tick did. Since Tick is in the hospital Barry,the former Tick, decides to work a deal out with a group of super villains. They are lead by Chairface Chippendale. And the deal is Barry will bust them while they are committing crimes,but he will let them go instead of turning them over to the police. Well since Barry is a little bit insane he ends up just beating the shit outta the various villains. So a small group lead by Chairface goes to bust The Tick outta Evensville. This all comes together in the third issue,where two groups,one made up of Arthur and the MOAV and the other a group of villains with Chairface show up. The evil doctor tries his best to remove Tick's mask but no matter what it won't come off. This causes the doctor to proclaim "The mask is the Tick and the Tick is the mask." An explosion happens and most of the villains are captured. Arthur,the Tick and MOAV escape unharmed. But the evil doctor is badly injured and before he dies he reveals a secret about the Tick to Arthur. Sadly this isn't revealed to us the readers. When I first read this was already a huge tick fan cause of the Foxkids cartoon, I had heard of the NEC comic,and even owned a couple of issues. But had never read any of them. Thanks to the great owner of Lynns Comics in Nederland Texas, I started reading this series. He gave all 4 issues to me and told me go read them if you don't like them you can keep them for free,if you do like them give me 12 bucks for all 4. Needless to say I loved them,and over a course of about 2 years managed to acquire most of the previous Tick comics,and bought every new Tick series that came out. The storyline was really good,lots of oddball humor with a touch of seriousness that was the trademark for the original Ben Edlund Tick run. The artwork was also good,sure it's black and white,but the shading gave it a depth that most current color comics don't seem to have. The Tick Luny Bin Trilogy earns a B+.

I love the cheap bins 02

Americomics #3

Published by AC comics

1983

The second and final appearance of one of the Charlton Action Heroes from AC comics. This issue contains 2 stories. The first one "Return from Pago Island" story/inks by Rik Levins edits/inks by Bill Black stars the Ted Kord Blue Beetle. While he is taking down a warehouse full of criminals,Ted is surprised by the original Beetle Dan Garrett busting through the wall. It seems that Dan is mad at Ted for abandoning him at Pago Island,and is back for revenge. After a fairly lengthily fight it turns out that the Dan Beetle is a robot that Ted's crazy uncle created. Ted manages to take it down and the story ends. The second story "The Blue Beetle to live again" Written by Leo J Laney and Neal Stannard,with art by Leo J Laney and Bill Black. Two very Kirbyish looking gods bring the 1940's Dan Garrett Beetle back to life. Some gangsters have kidnapped Ted Kord and Dan goes to save him. Using the powers granted to him by vitamin X,Dan manages to take out all the gangster fairly quick.At the end him and Ted shake hands and plan on teaming up again. This issue unlike the Sentinels of justice one isn't that great,the first story has good art and an ok story,but is nothing special. The second story has art that is a weird mix of Kirby and Ditko. The story is fairly cliched and not that good. Americomics #3 earns a 5.5. And that is mainly for the front and back covers.

Sweet zombie Jesus

WOW!!!!

I have been looking for this softcover for a few years now. I have seen it for sale on Ebay,but refused to pay what most people wanted for it. Well all the waiting finally paided off. I am currently on vacation on the Mississippi gulf coast. And there is a great comic shop in this area that I try to visit everytime I am down here. Well I was looking at the Tradepaper backs and hardcovers and found Kimota sitting on the shelf.I was figuring it would be priced at at least $30. But it had no price anywhere on it,well besides the original price. And since I know that it is not only out of print,but in high demand I figured it would be priced way over what I want to pay. Well I pick it up and go to dig through the $1 bins. The owner of the shop walks by and ask me if I had read much Miracleman. I told him I had read it all and only needs this book and issue 24 to complete my collection. Turns out he has a few copies of 24 and goes to the back to pull one out. He brings it to me and it looks near mint. So I gather up 24 and kimota and head to the register. Figuring I am looking at at least $80. He tells me Kimota is $10 and 24 is $25. I tell him I'm more than glad to give him 40 or 45 for both,but he refuses. So I paid for both and then went back to the dollar bins and bought about 20 comics. Kimota is a guide to one of the most under rated comics of the 80s/90s. Written by Alan Moore and later on Neil Gaimen,Miracleman was one of the earliest deconstrution of the superhero genres. This guide has interviews with almost everyone that was ever involved with the series. And shitpiles of unreleased artwork. I'm only about half way thru it and already have learned so much about the history of the comic. I urge anyone who has read Miracleman to seek out and buy this book. Kimota earns a sold 9.5. If it had more color artwork it would get a perfect 10.

I love the cheap bins 01

Americomics Special #1

Sentinels of Justice

published by AC Comics in 1983

Written by Dan Saint John

Art by Greg Guler

Backgrounds by Matt Feazell

This is one of two issues published by AC comics in the early 80's that features the old Charlton Action Heros. In this issue Blue Beetle,Ted Kord,Captain Atom,Nightshade and The Question are the super team Sentinels of Justice. They are called together to meet up with the police commissoner. He tells them about a rash of robberies that all involve alternate forms of energy. So he sends the four masked heroes to protect a new solar battery. Turns out a villian ,The Manipulator,is the mastermind behind these robberies. He has assembled a team consisding of Iron Arms,Fiery-Icer and "the lunatic terrorist group" The Madmen. The next day at Whittier Hall the battery is being shown to the public,Captain Atom and Nightshade are inside in their civilian identities. And Beetle and Question are outside keeping watch. Beetle spots a hovercar,and radios Question and they both head into the hall. An 8 page battle happens with the heroes taking out every villian but the Manipulator. But seems Manipulator has an ace up his sleeve. He presses a button on the cuff of his jacket and The Banshee flys in through a window grabs the Manipulator and flies off. The four heroes try to follow him,but it turns out that Iron Arms isnt as defeated as they thought he was. So they work together to take him out. On the final page we see Manipulator bragging about he has a spy inside the Sentinels of Justice team,and we see a shadowy figure who it turns out is the real lead villain. Sadly we will never find out who this shadowy man is. Since right after this book was finished the Charlton Action Heroes were sold to DC. This was a fun comic. It was the basic first story of a superteam that any comic fan has read many times,but you can see where it has plenty of pontential. The artwork while not the best is still nice and clean. I would have loved to see what AC had planned for futher issues of this title,but that never happened. But since I found this for $1,it is more than worth what I paid. If you are a fan of either the Charlton run of these four heroes,or the later DC run it is worth finding a copy. One thing I liked about it was it was printed on slick paper,but it wasn't the super shiny paper that is used a lot today. Americomics Special #1 gets a 7 outta 10.

31 days of horror Day 31

The Return of the living dead

Source- MGM original DVD release

Besides Texas chainsaw massacre this is my favorite horror film of all time. I was lucky that my uncle took me to see it when it first came out. It has just right blend of horror and comedy. Freddy is on his night at a new job. He works at a medical supply warehouse. His co-worker goes to show him something in the basement. It is a corpse in some kind of military drum. One of them hits it with a wrench and a yellow gas starts leaking out. They both pass out. Across the street in the cemetery,Freddy's girlfriend and 5 of his friends are hanging out waiting on him to get off work. Freddy and his co-worker wake up to discover all the dead bodies in the warehouse have become reanimated. They end up cutting one up with a saw and stuffing it into a trash bag. They haul it across the street to a morgue that also has a crematorium. The mortician is a friend and agrees to burn up the reanimated parts. Well the smoke produced by burning the parts gets up in the clouds and causes it to rain. Then all hell breaks loss all the corpses in the graveyard come back to life and you end up with Freddy,the mortician,the co-worker and most of his friends barricading themselves into the morgue. One by one they die then it becomes apparent that from the exposure to the yellow smoke earlier Freddy and his co-worker are also becoming zombies. The cast in this film is just amazing,from a young Linnea Quigley and Jewel Sheppard to Clu Gulager James Karen Don Calfa,the cast does great work. The effects are very very good for what is a small budgeted mid 80's film. And the soundtrack is amazing,sadly some of it is changed on both DVD releases. But the VHS release is the original soundtrack and it isn't too hard to find now. This is a film that I end up watching at least 8 or so times a year,and usually at least once on Halloween. Return of the living dead gets an A+.

31 days of horror Day 30

Jack Ketchum's The lost

Source- Anchor bay DVD

Ray Pye is a disturbed young man. To make up for being short he puts crushed beer cans in his boots. Him and a couple of friends are out in the woods getting drunk when Ray runs into what he thinks is a couple of lesbians. Ray takes a rifle and kills both girls. Fast forward a couple of years later. Ray live in a room at the motel his mom manages. He is always having wild parties and seems to manage to get any girl he wants. But the new maid his mom has just hired turns him down,and this pisses Ray off. He ends up dating a new girl in town,and everything is going great then one night trying to impress the girl he tells her about shooting and killing the 2 girls many years ago. She of course now wants nothing to do with Ray. This starts his flash trip to insanity. Ray ends up kidnapping the two aforementioned girls,plus another he has been seeing off and on for years. He takes them to a house he thinks is abandoned. Discovering a couple there who are packing up stuff,Ray freaks out and starts to slaughter everyone there. Based partially on true stories this film based on a great Jack Ketchum novels while not 100 percent horror has a level of intensity that very few current films can match. The final 10 minutes will rattle most people's nerves. Over the acting was good or in some cases almost perfect. While not a feel good movie,it is one that will make you think. Jack Ketchum's The Lost gets an A.

31 days of horror Day 29

Return to Horror high/Return of the killer tomatoes

Source- Anchor Bay double feature DVD

Two 80's horror comedies that both have George Clooney in them. Up first Return to Horror high. A film crew is filming in a high school where a few years back a series of bloody murders happened. Clooney plays a minor role,and he is the first one killed. This is your average slasher,but the touches of humor help raise it above crap like Prom Night,Happy Birthday to me,and Graduation Day. You get a nice cameo by Maureen McCormick as a cop that gets turned on by gore. Nice amounts of jump scares and gore. And the ending is something most people will never guess. Now Return of the Killer Tomatoes is more comedy than horror,but it has IMHO the best acting from Clooney. In this film you have Doctor Gangreen taking the killer tomatoes and turning them into humans with a process that involves music. One of these human/tomatoes runs away and falls in love with Clooney's roommate. Lots of sight gags,and cameos from cast from the first film. The product placement gag is one of the best I have ever seen. Return to Horror High earns a B-,and Return of the killer Tomatoes earns a B+.

Wondering why I did two films today? Mainly cause tomorrow I will be heading out on vacation and might not be able to do that days post to really late.

31 days of horror Day 28

Who can kill a child

Source- Dark Skys DVD

OK first off this was recommended to me by a friend who's opinion i trust. Well this time he steered me wrong. A British couple is on vacation in Spain. And the husband wants to go back to an island he visited many years back. They take a small boat there. When they get their the only people they see are all children. Turns out something has happened to the children on this island and they are killing off all the adults. The couple ends up being chased by the kids and finally they lock themselves in a jail cell in the local jail. A young kid,looks to be like 8 climbs up into the windowsill and tries to shoot them. The husband kills the kid and the wife freaks out. She is pregnant and not too much longer the fetus starts eating her from the inside out.This was the best scene in this almost 2 hour long film. The next morning the husband leaves the jail and heads to the dock to take the boat back to the mainland. On his way there he runs into the kids,and he guns down about 9 of them. Like an idiot he drops his gun and starts running to the dock. Of course the kids take up the chase. He makes it to the boat and the kids are right behind him. He starts fighting them off with an oar. As the kids are attacking him a police boat pulls up and sees him attacking the kids. The police officer shots him,and he falls dead into the water. The police go onto the docks,and the kids tell them the adults are right around the corner in the city. As the cops walk off the kids grab the officers guns off the cop boat and kill the cops. The movie ends with a group of the kids taking a boat to the mainland. Lots of things wrong with this movie. First off it has about 45 minutes worth of story but it runs almost 2 hours long. Besides one quick scene at the 30 minutes mark nothing much happens until the 1 1/2 hour mark. Both of the lead actors were pretty bad. The gore effects,what little their was ,were OK but nothing special. Who can kill a child earns a D-.

31 days of horror Day 27

Maniac

Source- Oop Anchor Bay DVD

Made in 1980,Maniac stars Joe Spinell and Caroline Munro. Joe stars as Frank Zito,who is a very very disturbed man. He was mentally and physically abused by his mother at a young age. And still suffers from that ordeal. When the horrors of this abuse becomes to much for him he prowls the seedy streets of early 80's NYC in search of women to kill. Frank ends up meeting a beautiful photographer who is played by Caroline Munro. Even when with him sorta dating this woman he still feels the need to go out and kill.This is a film that is mainly remembered now for the amazing Tom Savini effects. The shotgun to the head and the scalping scenes are still terrifying today. Spinell is a great actor that sadly died too young. Caroline is her usually adequate self,not a great actress but not horrible either. The main big problems with this movie is no-one will believe that someone as stunningly beautiful as Caroline dating Joe,and the ending. Up until the final 15 minutes the movie is great,but the ending where it seems the victims of Joe's previous killings come back to get him just doesn't work. The effects are good,but the scene doesn't fit in with the rest of the movie. Mainly cause the rest of the film is so grounded in reality. But overall this is a film anyone calling themselves a horror fan needs to see at least once. Maniac earns a A-.