31 days of horror Year 3 day 31 twelveth film

Now I have been a huge fan of the Ernest character for years. So recently I got a DVD that had "Ernest goes to camp","Ernest goes to Jail" and "Ernest scared stupid". I haven't seen any of these three films in over a decade.

In this film Ernest is a garbage man in a small town. We find out that the town has a legend about a troll. Well Ernest is helping his younger friends to build a tree house way out in the woods. Well this tree is in the town witch's backyard. She finds out and tells Ernest that he is descended from a troll hunter. Who captured the evil troll Trantor and placed him into the tree the tree house is built in. She warns Ernest that if he places his hand on the tree and says "Yeah I call thee forth, Trantor!" the troll will be released. Well of course Ernest being the idiot he is he does this. And the troll is released.

Well the rest of the film is Ernest and the kids fighting off the troll. They discover that the troll one main weakness is milk. So we get plenty of water balloons and super soakers filled with milk. Then finally at the end Ernest manages to defeat the troll and everyone is happy.

It amazes me how well this film holds up today. I know I saw it in theaters. And pretty sure I saw it a few times on VHS. Ernest Scared Stupid gets a A.

31 days of horror Year 3 day 31 eleventh film

From dusk to dawn
1996
Dimension Collector's Series DVD

We start off with a Texas ranger heading into a liquor store. He talks to the clerk for a few minutes then heads back to use the bathroom.Then we see the Geko brothers running up and confronting the clerk. They hear that the cop is coming back out,so they hide again. Well the Gekos come back out and shot the ranger. Then also killed the clerk. And on their way out they set the place on fire.

We find out that the younger brother had just helped the older brother escape from prison. They have robbed a bank and are now on their way to Mexico. They end up kidnapping an minister and his 2 kids. So they make the minister drive his RV to Mexico. They arrive at the place they are suppose to meet up with their contact. It is a huge bar called the Titty Twister. The older brother says everyone is gonna go inside and have some drinks. While they wait till dawn for their contact to show up.

A little while after they are inside,they discover that everyone working in the bar is a vampire. And we get close to a hour of our "heroes" versus the vampires. We get plenty of great kills. Plus an almost naked Selma Hayek. Finally it is dawn and only the older Geko brother and the daughter are still alive.

Now this DVD set is packed with plenty of extras. The film has a great commentary with Robert Rodriguez and Quentin Tarrentino. Then the second DVD has  the "Full Tilt Boogie" documentary that was made while the filming was happening.Sadly this edition is out of print. And the only version that is in print is the new re-release from Echo Bridge. This version has no extras at all. From Dusk to Dawn gets  a B+.

31 days of horror Year 3 day 31 tenth film

American Psycho
2000
Lionsgate Killer Collection edition DVD

Based on the controversial book,American Psycho is a film that tries to push the envelope. I misses this when it came out in theaters. So I rushed out and rented the DVD the day it came out. Having had read the book years ago I really enjoyed the film.

Patrick Bateman is a upper class yuppie. He works for a business that his father owns. He seems semi-normal,but we quickly realize that he is a sociopath. He has no problem with killing people that bother him. Patrick gets pissed off when someone has a better business card than he does. So he leaves and goes out and kills a bum and a dog.

Later on  Patrick meets up at a party with Paul. Patrick invites him back to his apartment. He puts on some music and comes up behind Paul and kills him with an ax. So Patrick disposes of the body. And then starts taking hookers back to the Paul's apartment. We get a great scene with Patrick buck naked chasing a hooker around the apartment complex with a chainsaw.

After killing a bunch of people.Patrick calls his lawyer to confess to all the killing he has done. He goes back to the dead guy's apartment. Where he has been storing most of the dead bodies. But when he gets there the apartment is cleaned up and a Realtor is showing it to some people interested in renting it. The next day Patrick runs into his lawyer at a bar. The lawyer seems to think that Patrick's phone call was a joke. And the lawyer claims that he saw Paul 10 days ago. So we are left wondering if Patrick has really been killing people,or was it all in his head.

Now the film is very different from the book. But the film is still pretty damn good.The acting is amazing. And all of the kills are well done. American Psycho gets a A-.

31 days of horror Year 3 Halloween Night extra

Halloween series overview

Released in 1978,the original Halloween was for many many years the biggest independent money making film.It is considered by some fans to be the first film in the slasher genre. But I don't think it is. You had films like Black Christmas,Texas Chain Saw Massacre,and all the Italian giallos that came before this one. Bob Clark,the creator of Black Christmas,has said that he had an idea for a Black X-mas sequel set at Halloween. And that he had told John Carpenter this idea.

Halloween-For a slasher film this has very little gore. And is way more stylish than most slasher films.We get a decent killer in Michael Myers. And Jamie Lee Curtis who is called the original scream queen. Now I do enjoy the film ,but think it is somewhat over-rated by most horror fans.B-.

Halloween 2-Made 3 years after the original was such a huge hit. This film isn't nearly as stylish as the original and the gore factor is raised. We get the return of Jamie Lee,who wears an awful wig and Donald Pleasence.I have always hated this entry and find it to be pretty disappointing over all. D+.

Halloween 3:Season of the witch-John Carpenter's original idea was that each year to release a film with the title Halloween ,with each film being a separate film. Kind of a horror anthology ,with each year being a new storyline. When this was first released the fans hated it. Cause it didn't have Michael in it.But we get a great film,that has some good FX. And one of the catchiest jingles I have ever heard.B.

Halloween 4:the return of Michael Myers-5 year after the disastrous showing of Season of the witch,we get a proper sequel to Halloween 2. This is the film that started Danielle Harris's career as a scream queen. And it is a great entry in the series. B.

Halloween 5:the Revenge of Michael Myers-2 years after part 4,we get a new Halloween movie. Sadly it isn't as good as part 4. But we still get a decent slasher film. Besides the crappy ending the overall film is fun to watch. C.

Halloween :The curse of Michael Myers-After the failure of part 5 it was quite a few years before we got the next entry. We get a strange film that tries to hard to explain the origin of Michael. C-.

Halloween 666:the producer's cut-This is only out  there as a bootleg. And is very different from what was officially released. We get a better story. And more explanations to the whole Thorn storyline. Sadly it looks like this cut will never get a legit release. B.

Halloween:H20 twenty years later-This entry ignores parts 3-6 and is a direct sequel to part 2. Too bad it isn't that good. We get a few OK kills. But the storyline isn't that good. C-.

Halloween:Resurrection-This film seems like a quickly made money grab after H20 made a decent amount of money at the box office. We get a super shitty storyline,some bad acting.And the worst of all Busta Rhymes kung fu fighting Michael. The only real highlight to me is a small appearance by Katee Sackhoff.F+.

Halloween remake-After part 8 bombed,we got a remake instead of another sequel.Now this one is the film that divides the fan base. Lots of people hate  it. I am not really sure why. The first half,which deals with Michael's childhood,is entertaining and does a better job explaining why Michael did what he did,than the entire Thorn storyline. The gore FX is well done. And I am sure I will catch shit for this,but I like Scout Taylor Compton better as Laurie than Jamie Lee Curtis. B-.

Halloween 2 remake-This seems to be one of the most hated recent horror films. I have only watched it once,and that time I saw the director's cut. I can see why people don't care for it. But I still think it is better than the original part 2. C-.

31 days of horror Year 3 day 31 ninth film

Deadgirl
2009
Dark Sky films unrated director's cut DVD

Picked this one up at Movie Gallery when it was closing. I had heard some buzz about the film. So when I saw it for 50 cents I had to pick it up.

Rickie and JT are skipping high school. They goto an abandoned hospital. They end up running wild through out the place. And then they find a dark hallway. At the end of it is a girl strapped to a table. Turns out she still seems to be alive.

Well both the boys start fucking the girl a few days later. They realize she seems to be a zombie. So a couple of days later at school one of the guys is bragging to the jocks about this. So of course the jocks want to come bang the zombie chick. But she ends up biting one of them. At first it seems like this has no effect on him. But later that week he is at school in the bathroom and shits all his guts out into the toilet.

The two guys realize that if they get deadgirl to bite another girl they will have another piece of ass. So they are waiting in a parking lot to get this one girl. The get the girl they want. And head back to the abandoned hospital. Deadgirl gets free and Rickie and the new girl try to escape. But they get seperated. Rickie starts searching for her . He finds her but sees that JT has stabbed her in the back with a knife. Plus JT got bit by Deadgirl. So JT begs Rickie to let him bite the girl. We cut away then we see Rickie walking down the hallway and into a room. Where he has the now new zombie girl tied down to a table.

Deadgirl is one of the more original zombie movies to come out in years. It has some great acting and FX work.Deadgirl gets a B+.

31 days of horror Year 3 day 31 eighth film

Christina's House
2001
MGM DVD

Back around this time last year. I was spending some time with my aunt and saw that one of the neighbors was having a garage sale.So I went over to see what all they had for sale. The only thing that caught my eye was they had some used DVDs for 50 cents each. So I picked up about 8 DVDs.This movie was one of the ones I got.

The film starts off with a father and his teenage daughter moving into a new house. Quickly she finds herself a new boyfriend. Well things seem to be doing ok,then people start disappearing.

Now the film leaves all kinds of red herrings as to who is the killer in this film.We get clues pointing to the father,the boyfriend and the handyman. For a horror film this one has very very few kills. The few we get are somewhat gory,but still don't make up for the small amount we get. Then right near the end we get some Saw-like traps. And sadly this is the best thing in the film.

This DVD is barebones. And the film is extremely shitty. The acting is pretty bad. Plus the kills are pretty lame.Christina's House get a F+.

31 days of horror Year 3 day 31 seventh film

Laid to Rest
2009
Anchor Bay unrated director's cut DVD

We start off with a woman waking up inside a coffin. She has no idea who she is. She gets out and starts being chased by a guy wearing a chrome face mask. From this minute to the end of the film we get Chromeface chasing this girl all over the place. She does eventually remember who she is.

This is a film that is known for it's FX stuff and not for the plot. The plot is simply a way to get from one gory practical FX piece to another. The FX stuff is simply great. We get all kinds of nice bloody kills. Now I just heard a interview with the director and he admitted that most of the FX stuff is practical with small touches of CGI. Now I have watched the movie 4 times now and have never spotted the CGI. Laid to Rest gets a C+.

31 days of horror Year 3 day 31 sixth film

My Bloody Valentine
1981
Lionsgate Uncut DVD

I saw this years ago on HBO at my cousin's house. And enjoyed it. But I kept hearing about how much was cut out.So I keep looking for a uncut release. Then in 2009 right before the 3d remake hit theaters,Lionsgate released a uncut version to DVD.

20 years ago there was a cave in ,in the local mine. And 5 guys got trapped. By the time a rescue crew go to them there was only one guy left alive. He had survived by eating his dead co-workers bodys.This all happened on Valentines day. So the town quits celebrating that holiday

Flash forward to the early 80s. This will be the first year that the town celebrates Valentines Day. There is gonna be a huge dance. And most of the mine workers will be there. But someone ,wearing a miner's mask,is out there killing off people in some pretty gruesome ways.

Now that the film is uncut,we finally get to see how gory this film was meant to be. The former cut footage is of lesser quality,but still looks pretty good. We get some great kills. Plus this is one of the few slashers I have seen where most of the cast is 20's and 30's instead of teenagers. My Bloody Valentine gets a B.

31 days of horror Year 3 day 31 fifth film

Leprechaun
1993
Lionsgate four pack DVD

After a short segment at the beginning that tells us how the leprechaun go to the USA. We see a dad and his daughter,Tory played by Jennifer Anniston,are moving into a new house.They meet up with the crew of guys that are painting the house. Which is made up of a guy,a lil kid,and a retarded fat guy. The retarded guy ends up freeing the Leprechaun from it's prison.The retarded guy,Ozzie,sees a rainbow and goes running off to find the end. The lil kid follows him. At the end of the rainbow they find a pot of gold. Ozzie bites a piece of the gold to see if it is real,and ends up swallowing it.

Well from there we end up getting a film that is basically the Leprechaun chasing after Tory and the 3 painters. There is some decent gore fx,but sadly it doesn't make up for how bad most of the acting is. Anniston is really bad in this,she is so annoying you keep hoping for the Leprechaun to kill her. But sadly that never happens. Usually with most horror franchise series the first film is the best. Not so with the Leprechaun series.I have seen 5 of the 6 them have made. And part 1 is one of the worst of those 5. Leprechaun gets a D+.

31 days of horror Year 3 day 31 fourth film

Last house on the left
1972
MGM collector's edition DVD

After hearing about this film for many many years,I finally picked it up when the first DVD came out. This was the first non-documentary,non-porn film from Wes Craven and Sean Cunningham. There are many many stories about how this film shocked the hell out of audiences back during it's original run. Supposedly this DVD has the most complete version of the film. It seems that lots of movie theaters would edit out scenes. Sadly there is a few scenes that are still missing,and some that have been found but have no sound.

Mari and her friend are on their way to see a concert in the city. They want to pick up some pot before they goto the show. So they ask this young guy they see standing outside a house if he knows were to get any. Well he tells them he has some inside. So they follow him inside and get attacked by the guys father and friends.

The next morning both girls are loaded up into the trunk of a car and Krug and his gang head out. The gang are all escaped convicts. So they are trying to make their way outta the state. Well the car breaks down,and none of them can fix it. So they take the girls and head off into the nearby woods.Mari happens to see that they aren't too far from her home.

Once they get deep in the woods Krug and company start to sadistically torture both girls. After some time they gut Mari's friend. Then Krug brutally rapes Mari and then carves his name into her chest. She wanders off into a nearby lake. So Krug shoots her in the head.

The gang goes and washes up at the lake and then changes into clean clothes. They goto the nearest house and pretend to be a group of salesmen who have broken down. Well the house just so happens to be Mari's home. Earlier on,while trying to escape Mari had given a necklace to Krug's son. After dinner that night the father spots this necklace and him and his wife head out into the woods. They find Mari's dead body on the shore of the lake. So they go back home. The dad starts setting various booby traps. What is it with Wes Craven films and booby traps? Then over the rest of the film the mom and dad kill the gang in some very vicious ways.

Now this DVD is packed with extras.We get a commentary with Fred Lincoln,Marc Sheffler and the late David Hess. The documentary Celluloid crime of the century,a few deleted scenes. And then the footage I mentioned before that has no sound. I keep hearing people,mostly the generation after me,talking about how they don't like the film. And how it is so bad and not worth a shit. Well I gotta say the first time I saw it I was shocked. The various torture and rape scenes are extremely brutal for the time they were shot. Plus the film has this look to it that makes it look more like you are watching some one's twisted home movies. Last House on the Left gets a B+.

31 days of horror Year 3 day 31 third film

Rest Stop:dead Ahead
2006
WB Raw Feed Double Feature DVD

Jess and Nicole are on their way to California. Nicole starts complaining about how she needs to piss. So Jess finds a rest stop. But when Nicole comes back out Jess is missing. She looks all around for him. And he isn't there. Then this crazy truck driver passes by and throws out a red cellphone that belonged to Jess. She starts looking around for help,and finally finds an old bet up RV. After knocking on the door she is invited inside by the fucking insane family. But she is quickly thrown out cause she looked at someone they told her not to look at.

Nicole walks back to the rest stop. Inside the bathroom she finds a woman who is cut up and bleeding. This woman warns Nicole about the truck driver. Nicole turns her head to look at something. And when she turns it back the woman and all the blood has disappeared. Nicole keeps away from the crazy guy driving the yellow truck. But then a cop shows up. She thinks her nightmare is over. But the cop ends up getting hit by the yellow truck.

Nicole drags the cop into the restroom. But while she is distracted by him. The trucker locks the door. She goes to see what is going on. She manages to get the door open somewhat,when the trucker appears and bites one of her fingers off. She goes back to the cop,when all of the sudden a camera is throw into the room. She checks it out and sees a video of Jess being tortured by someone. The trucker shoves a hose threw the broken window and starts pumping gas into the bathroom. Nicole notices a hatch on the ceiling. Since the cop is gonna die anyway,he ask her to shot him with his gun. She misses on the first shot. But finally kills him. Nicole barely makes it threw the ceiling hatch and off the top of the restroom,before it blows up.

Nicole sees the man in the yellow truck standing with his back to her. So she sneaks up and knocks him to the ground. When she rolls him over she finds out that it is really Jess. He has his mouth sewed shut.

Nicole breaks into the park ranger's station that is at the rest stop. She finds an old whiskey bottle,and fills it up with gasoline. Once it is dawn she starts walking down the highway. And she hears the yellow truck approaching. Nicole manages to light her makeshift molotav cocktail. She throws it and it sets the truck on fire. Outta nowhere Jess appears beside Nicole. She sees him and then everything fades to black.

We flash forward,and a new girl has stopped at the rest stop. She finds Nicole inside the bathroom bleeding and crying. So the new girl goes to get the park ranger. But when they come back Nicole is gone. They leave and we see Nicole hiding in the maintance closet,where she is vomiting blood.

We cut to some video footage. It is the dad from the RV,and he is burying the man from the yellow truck. We cut away and then see the man in the yellow truck driving his truck down the highway.

Now before seeing this,I hadn't even heard of it. But it was $5 for Rest Stop:Dead Ahead and Rest Stop:Don't look back. The film has this strange vibe too it. Where you really have no idea what is going on most of the time. But that helps make it different from most  of the DTV horror that has come out the past decade. The acting and the FX are all good. Rest Stop:Dead Ahead gets a B-.

31 days of horror year 3 day 31 second film

Diary of the Dead
2007
Dimension Extreme DVD

I missed this during it's short theatrical run. Then didn't bother getting the DVD for years. Now I kept hearing all the fucking time online about how horrible this film was. And how Romero should be embarrassed to have made it. Well I found the DVD cheap last month and said fuck it I will get it.And really enjoyed it.

We start off with some college students way out in the woods filming a low budget mummy horror film. Then it hits the news that the dead are coming back to life. Two of students quickly leave and go back to one of their houses. The rest of the kids pile up in a Winnebago and head off to the University of Pittsburgh. So they can see if the director's girlfriend is OK.

They arrive and the dorm is a ghost town. Quickly they get the girlfriend and head out to try to get every member of their group back to their homes. Along the way they encounter lots of zombies. And run into a group of survivalist. This group hooks them up with some gas,food,and weapons.

Well thru the Internet they get in touch with the two who left them earlier. And they say they are doing great and they should all come and stay with them. It seems the guy has rich parents and has this huge house loaded down with food and stuff.

After some more adventures they finally get there. But it seems something is weird. The host is acting very strange,then they find out that his parents,the house staff,and the girl that left with him are all zombies. And he is keeping them trapped in the heated pool in the backyard. While going out there to see them ,one of the guys notices that the host is bleeding. So they start preparing for him to turn into a zombie. Which of course happens. And we end up getting a great Romero style "WE ARE ALL FUCKED!!!" ending.

The entire film is filmed by two main cameras. The lead guy,Jason, usually is manning one of the cameras. And the other is passed off to many different people. Like I said earlier I kept reading online reviews about how horrible this was. And sure it isn't as good as say Night of the living dead or Dawn of  the dead. But it is a well done new spin on the zombie film and well worth watching. Diary of the Dead gets a B.

31 days of horror year 3 day 31 first film

Ok gonna try to get 12 films watched today. So there should be a new review every 2 hours or so. No idea if I will manage to do it. But I have 4 two liters of Mountain Dew to help make sure I don't fall asleep.

Dolly Dearest
1992
Epix3 airing

This aired this month on the fucking great channel EPIX3. This channel seems to always  be showing stuff that isn' t out on DVD. I really have no idea how many people get it but fuck it rules. Dolly Dearest ,Well I remember seeing the box cover in various video stores for years. But never rented it. But saw that it was airing,so set the DVR and then transferred it to a DVD-r.

This is about a family of four moving down to Mexico. The dad is taking over a old very well respected doll factory. And right off the bat the dad and the two kids go to visit it. Well while there the daughter finds an old doll that she falls in love with. So the dad lets her take it home. The son wanders off and discovers that there is a archeology dig happening right behind the factory. This gets his attention cause he wants to be an archaeologist when he gets older.

Well over the next few days strange things start happening. The daughter starts freaking out anytime the maid is praying. And then one night when the parents go out the doll kills the maid. Well the son the next day sneaks into the dig site and discovers it is an ancient Sanzia tomb. The Sanzia's are Mexican Satanists. Well it is easy to figure out that some kind of evil spirits have possessed the doll/dolls. And fairly quickly the dolls left at the factory start attacking various people. And what really surprised me is how well done the doll effects are done. I am assuming they used midgets in suits for some scenes. But the doll's faces are very expressive and this helps add to the atmosphere of the film.

Going in I was expecting a low budget Chucky ripoff. And what I got was  a nice medium budget spin on the Chucky films. The acting and FX work are pretty decent and there is a few decent jump scares. Dolly Dearest gets a C+.

31 days of horror Year 3 day 30 comics 05

Curse of the Weird #3

First off I love this cover. The homage to Basil Wolverton caps off what is already an eye catching cover. This issue we get a total of 4 stories. First off is "The Return of the Brain" with pencils and inks by Russ Heath Jr. The brain of  a dead Nazi scientist goes around causing mayhem. Wacky idea that works pretty well. "The Hog" is next,with pencils and inks by the legendary Joe Kubert.Good story about a guy who is a road hog. Really if it wasn't for the Kubert artwork I doubt this story would have been reprinted. But the art is up to Joe usual standards. "Till Death do us part" with pencils and inks by Vic Carrabotta is the next one. Typical husband wants to kill wife story. Sadly nothing really made this stand out,and the artwork is the normal blah stuff from this era. "Where Monsters Dwell" which is written and drawn by the great ,and sadly kinda forgotten,Basil Wolverton. Scientist make a beam that allows them access to another dimension. And it is full of monsters. Lots of great Wolverton artwork that takes what is really a below average story and raises it up a few levels. We get another few pages telling us about the history of these stories and it is a nice piece giving some much needed context. Curse of the Weird #3 gets a A.

31 days of horror Year 3 day 30

Now I have always somewhat enjoyed the various Children of the Corn films. But after part 5 I didn't bother seeing any of them. Well  good friend of mine told me to check out part 666,mainly cause it was a direct sequel to the original. But I never saw it for rental,and never saw the DVD for sale anywhere. Then earlier this month,I found a DVD set that had Children of the Corn 2,3,4,5,666 and 7. And it was priced at $5. So even though I already owned 2-5 I picked it up.

We start off with a young adult girl in her car heading for the town of Gatlin. It seems she was adopted and found out her blood parents were from Gatlin. Well she stops to pick up this old man that is hitchhiking. And he starts acting very strange. Then all of the sudden he disappears and she crashes into a cornfield. The local sheriff shows up and takes her to the local hospital.

While she is there she finds out that Isaac,who was the leader of the corn cult,is still alive. He has been in a coma since the end of the first film. But when she shows up Isaac comes out of his coma. The girl decides to stay the night and goes to the only hotel in the town.

She keeps seeing all kinds of strange hallucinations. And slowly we find out about a  prophecy that she will hook up with Isaac's son and produce the next generation of the Children of the corn. But of course there is a twist

This is ,behind part 4,the best of the Children of the Corn sequels. The acting and story are pretty good. And the kills are fun. I like how they brought back the original Isaac to the series. Children of the Corn 666:Isaac's Return gets a C+.

31 days of horror year 3 day 29 comics 04

Curse of the Weird #4

The final issue of this forgotten mini series. We start off pretty good with a great cover by Tenneyson Smith. This moody cover really stands out. The first story is the never reprinted in color and uncensored classic "Zombie". Written by Stan Lee and with Bill Everett on the art chores this a great slice of pre-code horror. It even was spun off into it's own b/w magazine by Marvel in the 70's. The dark moody artwork must have been a shock to the comic reading public back when this was first published. "The End of the World" is a nice slice of Sci fi. But it not for the great Basil Wolverton artwork it would be just your average story. "Worlds at War" has art by Jack Davis. This funny sci fi story has fun artwork from a guy mainly known for his time working on Mad magazine and his stuff at EC."There'll be some changes made" is the finaly story. And it helps end this issue and the series on a high note. We get stunning artwork from Steve Ditko,and a story that isn't completely predictable. I get the feeling that this mini didn't sell too well. Which is sad cause I would have loved more pre-code reprints of stories. But at the time people seemed more interested in buying gimick covered crap. Curse of the Weird #4 gets a A.

31 days of horror Year 3 day 29

Released in 2001,this film directed by Ernest Dickerson is a tribute to not only Blaxploitation films but Euro horror. I avoided the film,mainly cause I doubted a film with Snoop Dogg as the lead would be worth seeing. But after a bunch of friends told me how much they thought I would like it,I ended up renting it. And really enjoyed it.

Snoop stars as Jimmy Bones. Who was ,back in the 70s,a numbers runner and pot dealer. But he also made sure that his neighborhood was safe. But then his people that worked with him wanted him to start dealing coke,Snoop refused. And so they killed him. Well his ghost started to haunt his home.

We go forward about 20 years. And a group of kids from the nice part of town have just bought Bone's old house. They want to change it into a night club. But Bones comes back and starts killing off people. Bones is after the people who killed him. And we end up getting some great kills. Lots of very interesting camera angles and use of colors. Plus we get Pam Grier as Bone's now middle aged old girlfriend.

When watching the film you can see that Dickerson was inspired by lots of the 60s and 70s euro horror stuff. Mainly the various Mario Bava films. Visually the film is one of the better horror films of the decade of the 2000s. The storyline is OK,sure it has been done before. But at least it is better than lots of other films that get more praise. Bones gets a C+.

31 days of horror Year 3 day 28

Student bodies is a 1981 slasher spoof film. I had not heard about this film till sometime in high school. A guy I knew ,who knew how much I was into horror,loaned me his VHS of it. And I really enjoyed the film. Well I didn't see the film again till at least 10 years later. I saw a divx rip of the film on a torrent site. So I downloaded it and enjoyed it even more this time. So when a few weeks ago I saw that The Movie Channel was airing it,I had to record it. Turns out they aired a nice looking wide screen print.

We start off with a teenage girl who is babysitting some kids. The kids go to bed and the babysitter is waiting on her boyfriend to show up. Well the phone rings and it is someone who keeps breathing super heavy. She hangs up,but the phone rings again. She picks it up and cum starts coming outta the phone. Well she freaks out,but her boyfriend shows up. She sends him off to shower and heads to one of the bedrooms to get ready to have sex with him. Well the killer turns up and we get a great scene of him trying to figure out what weapon he wants to use. He has many many choices but ends up selecting a paperclip.

Well all through out the film we get all kinds of sight gags. Like every time someone is killed we get an onscreen counter to tell us how many people are dead. We also get some onscreen clues as to the various suspects. This film is in some ways like the Naked gun series,in that there is some many gags happening that it takes multiple viewings to see them all.

There is two things about this film that most people remember now. The first one is a short scene about half way in the film. The movie stops and we see an older man sitting behind a desk. He informs us that to get a R rating a film must have graphic violence,graphic nudity or graphic reference to the act of sex. And since it is proven that R rated movies make more money he tells us to "Fuck Off". The other thing that most people remember is Malvert. Who is the strange looking janitor of the school. He seems to be double jointed. In the credits he is said to be played by someone called The Stick. And not much is known about the Stick.

It seems that in the past 15 years we have gotten a shit pile of films spoofing horror films. But none of them are half as good as Student bodies. And just think Student Bodies was made very early on during the slasher cycle of films. Student Bodies gets a C+.

31 days of horror Year 3 TV 04

The Walking Dead Season 02 Episode 02

The show starts with Rick running through a field with Carl in his arms. He is closely followed by Shane and a fat hunter. They are heading to the house the hunter is staying in ,where someone named Hershel is suppose to  be able to get the bullet outta Carl.

Cut to a flashback,it is the day that Rick was shot. And we see Lori waiting for Carl to get out of school. Shane shows up and tells Lori what has happened. Shane says it is his fault. Then Carl comes out of the school and Lori goes and tells him that his father has been shot.

Rick and the rest make it to this house. They tell Hershel that Otis,the fat hunter guy,has sent him. Hershel takes them to a back room and has the women there get all his medical supplies. He ask what blood type Carl is. Rick tells him that him and Carl are the same blood type.So one of the ladies starts to draw some blood from Rick.

Back in the woods Lori,Glen,Daryl,Andrea and the other lady are still looking for Sophie. It will be getting dark soon,so they all agree to head back to the RV.Then the next day they will come back looking for Sophie. Lori is worried cause they heard a gunshot,and they haven't seen Rick,Carl or Shane in sometime.

Back at the RV,Dale and T-dawg are busy getting spare parts and stuff outta all the abandoned cars. Dale ask T-dawg how he is doing. T seems to ignore him,so Dale comes over and confronts him about this. Dale ask to look at T's injured arm. He sees that T has a massive infection and tells him they need to find some antibotics soon. So they start lookin through every car for any kind of antibotic they can find. T is searching in one car's glove box when he discovers a bottle of pills and what I have to assume is a joint. He lights up the joint,then happens to glance into the backseat. He sees a babyseat covered with blood,guts and what looks like brains. This freaks him out and he quickly leaves the car.

Back at the farm house Hershel is busy checking out Carl's wound. It seems the bullet has broke into 6 fragments. He manages to get one out. But he tells Rick that the rest are way deeper plus Carl has some internal bleeding. Plus he doesn't have all the equipment he needs to do what needs to be done to save Carl.Otis says that the FEMA shelter set up at a nearby high school should have everything they need. So Otis and Shane head off to get it. Rick wants to leave to go get Lori,but Hershel tells him he is gonna need to get more blood from Rick for Carl. So one of Hershel's daughters heads off to go find Lori.

Dale walks up to see T-dawg sitting in the shade by the RV. He ask if T found anything,to which T replies that he found a bottle of ibuprofren and the joint. T starts talking about how with him being the only black guy he is sure the group will abandon him soon. Dale goes to feel T's forehead and sees he is burning up with fever.  He gives T some of the pills and tells him to settle down and try to relax.

The group out in the woods is almost back to the RV,when a zombie comes outta nowhere and tackles Andrea to the ground. It looks like she is a goner,but we see someone quickly heading their way on a horse. It is Hershel's daughter who hits the zombie in the head with a baseball bat. She ask which one is Lori and explains to her what has happened. Lori jumps on the horse and is getting ready to head to the farm with her. The daughter tells the rest of them how to get to the farm using the roads. And Lori and her head off.

The rest of the group arrive back at the RV and tell T and Dale what has happened. They all decide to stay the night. They are gonna put up a big sign telling Sophie,if she shows back up there,where they are heading. The group ask Dale how T is doing. Dale tells them that without some antibotics T will die soon. Daryl surprises everyone when he goes to his motorcycle sidebag and pulls out a huge bag of various prescription bottles. It seems this is Merle's stash. He gets out some pain killers and some antibiotics. It seems Merle got the clap a bunch so he always kept some antibiotics around.

Lori gets to the farm house. Goes to see Carl. She starts asking Hershel if he has done a surgery like this before. And he tells her has kind of. Turns out Hershel is  veterinarian. He tells them that Shane and Otis need to come back as quick as they can.

Otis and Shane get to the high school. Only to see that the Fema medical trailer is surrounded by a shitpile of zombies. So Shane thinks of a quick plan. He gets some road flares out of the trunk of a cop car. So the two of them light up the flares and throw them way away from the medical trailer. This causes the zombies to head away from the trailer. So the two guys sneak into it. They find all the stuff they need and are sneaking back out. When the zombie notice them and start chasing them. Shane and Otis get cornered,and Shane uses his shotgun to blow the glass outta two locked doors. They dash inside ,and Shane pulls a secruity gate shut. And we leave the scene with the two of them trapped with only a flimsy looking gate between them and a bunch of angry zombies.

This was a great building up episode. It sets into motion the stuff so that next weeks episode will be jammed packed with action. I liked the flashback,which wasn't in the comic. Plus the ending is a perfect cliffhanger. Making it so you can't wait on next weeks episode. The Walking Dead season 02 episode 02 gets a B+.

31 days of horror year 3 TV 03

American Horror Story Season 01 Episode 03

We start off in 1983. With the hot ass redheaded maid fixing up a bed. A man comes in and starts flirting with her,but she tries to ignore his advances. He gets mad and throws her onto the bed and starts to rape her. When all of the sudden Jessica Lange walks in and catches the two of them. It seems she is in love with the man,and she pulls out a pistol and shots the maid in her right eye. Of course this kills her,then Jessica shots the man 3 times killing him. 

We cut to the mom finding out that thanks to some bad investments,the family is almost broke. And after what happened in the last episode,she wants to sell the house and move into an apartment. But the Dad informs her that they can't afford to do this.

Well the next day or so the mom is out in the front yard cutting some roses and a tour group comes by. It seems the house is one of the stops on the "Eternal Darkness tour". Which takes people around Los Angles showing them different places that people have died. Their home is nicknamed "Murder House". Well the mom decides to go on the tour to see what all the tour guide has to say about the house.

While she is gone ,the woman the father had an affair with shows up. Informing him that she is not going to abort the child. Plus she expects him to pay for her to move out to LA. Finally he agrees to meet with her the next day. Well his next patient comes in and she is so boring his mind starts to wander. He blacks out and wakes up in  the backyard. Laying on the ground and with blood on his hands. He freaks out and runs back inside ,only to see the maid on her hands and knees scrubbing up blood off the floor. She tells him she has already cleaned up his office. He goes into his office to look for the digital recorder he uses during every patients session. But it is missing ,he confronts the maid about it. She denies taking it. And like in previous episodes the maid keeps trying to get the father to fuck her. This upsets him so much he grabs a hold of her and starts to shake the shit outta her. Well this is right when the mother decides to come home and she sees this.

We then cut to the kitchen and the parents are talking about if they should fire the maid. The dad wants her gone. But the maid calmly informs them that if she is fired she will sue them.So they reluctantly keep her. Well the mother has a meeting with the realtor that sold them the house. The realtor is told that she has to sell the house and get what the family has paid for it,and she needs to all she can to sell it quickly.

Well it seems to be the next day,the mom goes off on the Eternal Darkness tour. And while she is gone the father is arguing with the maid. When someone knocks at the front door. It is a detective,who informs them that the boring patient the father saw a few days ago is missing. So now the dad really thinks he has killed the boring woman. Well the ED tour gets to the house. And we learn that the house was built by a doctor who was pretty damn insane. Him and his wife back in the 20's were preforming abortions to pay their bills. Well all of the sudden the mom looks down and the crotch of her pants have this huge blood stain. So her and the father go off to see her doctor. They are informed that nothing is wrong. But that moving is a huge source of stress and they can't chance adding that much more stress to the mom. Or she might have another miscarriage.Later on that day there is a knock at the front door,and the mom goes to answer it. It is someone claiming they are there to see the house. So Connie invites the lady in. And it is the wife of the abortion doctor that first built the house. The wife walks around pointing out various stuff to the mom. They enter the kitchen,and the mom offers the wife a cup of tea. She turns her back to put the tea in the microwave. But when she turns back the wife is gone.

The father goes off jogging and again is confronted by one of the previous owners of the house. This time the burned up man ask for 1000 bucks so he can get some headshots for his next audition. The father of course turns him down. When the dad gets back to the house,the lady he had the affair with shows up and is super pissed. She now wants to tell the mother about the kid she is pregnant with. The dad is escorting her outta the house,when the burned up man pops up and beats the lady to death with a shovel. The dad wants to go call the cops,but the burned up man informs him that this isn't a good idea. So they decide to bury her in the backyard. Well the burned up man starts digging ,and we see that the maid and Jessica Lange are watching from one of the upper windows. Once the man finishes digging he finds a body already buried there. We cut back to the window and the maid is crying. Then Jessica tells her "Well I guess now you will be stuck here forever". So I must assume that this is where Jessica buried the maid's body after she killed her. We get a montage of the dad laying cement over the area and building a gazebo. Then we cut to later on that night they are both in bed. And you see a hand touching the mom's stomach. The camera pulls back and it is the abortion doctor's wife.

This show just keeps getting better and better with each episodes. I like how we find out why in episode two Jessica told the maid "Don't make me kill you again!". Plus we get a bunch more history of the house. American Horror story episode 03 gets a A-.

31 days of horror Year 3 day 27

This was the first film from the WWE films division. And I figured it would be a total pile of shit so I avoided it for years. Then in 2008,I was on my way to work and wanted a cheap dvd to watch. Well this was in the $5 bin so I picked it up. Looked at the credits and realized that Greg Dark,who used to direct lots of porn films in the 80s,directed it.

The film stars WWE superstar Kane as Jacob Goodnight. He is a psycho who has a love for plucking out people's eyeballs. Well after a short prologue the film proper starts. A group of deliquent kids who are in juvie hall are going to help clean up a old hotel.They are being offered time off their sentances be going to help clean and fix up this old hotel. And quickly they find out that there is someone besides themselves there.

Well there is 8 kids and we get a good amount of kills. Kane makes a great slasher villain.Cause the guy is tall and very imposing. The gore effects are a ok combo of practical effects and CGI. And most of them work. The one kill that stands out the most to me is when this one annoying blonde chick is killed by Kane shoving a cellphone down her throat.

The DVD has a ok amount of extras. We get 2 commentaries. One has Kane and one of the executive producers. This isn't a bad commentary and Kane has plenty of fun stories to tell. The other one has Greg Dark and the writer Dan Madigan. This one isn't as good as the other one,but is still a fun listen. We get a making of featurette. And a shitpile of various WWE superstars talking about the film. On one of the commentaries someone mentions about wanting to do a sequel.Which I think it is a decent idea. But it has been 5 years and no sequel so far,so I doubt we will get one. See No Evil gets a B-.

31 days of horror Year 3 comics 03

Back in the 70's the comic code authority rules were relaxed and we got a new breed of horror comics. This time I will focus on the Marvel stuff.

Daimon Hellstorm,He is the son of Satan and a human woman. And from his father he has what is refered to as the darksoul. This gives him a variaty of powers. I always loved how even though he was the Son of Satan he was for a short while an exorcist and even almost became a monk at one time.The Son of Satan  first appeared in the first issue of the 70's Ghost Rider comic. Then was quickly given a short run in the Marvel Spotlight series.This run lasted 13 issues. This was popular enough that he got his own series. Titled Son of Satan it lasted for about 2 years. Once that was canceled He started appearing in the Defender's title. And was with the team for a long time. Towards the end of the Defender's he lost all his powers and retired to get married to Patsy "hellcat" Walker. For years nothing was done with Daimen. Then in the 90s Daimon was given a second solo series. This series,titled Hellstorm,while short lived was one of the most underrated titles of its era. We got 21 issues,and what is really surprising about the title is what it got away with even though it was approved by the CCA. But sadly it didn't sell well so it was canceled right in the middle of a storyline. Then  a few years later Marvel through it's MAX adult line put out a Son of Satan mini series.

First appearing in August of 1972,Johnny Blaze would be the second person to use the title of Ghost Rider in the Marvel Universe. He was a motorcycle stunt rider who sold his soul to a demon to save the life of his adopted father. And cause of this at first every night Johnny would change into the Ghost Rider and go out and fight crime. Slowly over the series this was changed and by the end Johnny could not only control when he would turn into Ghost Rider,but had was in control when he was in the Ghost Rider form. Over all the series was pretty well written. One storyline that was started but never full finished involved Ghost Rider meeting up with this stranger that kept helping him out. The original plan was for this stranger to turn out to be Jesus,but the storyline was shot down. By 1983 the sales of the Ghost Rider series were slumping,so the title was canceled. And it ended with Johnny losing the ability to become Ghost Rider. But of course Marvel revived him years later.

First appearing in Savage Tales #1 in 1971,Man-thing is Marvel's version of a swamp monster. Ted Sallis was down in Florida working on recreating the Super Solider Serum. He is attacked by a group of rogue scientiets and barely manages to escape into the Florida Everglades with the only sample he had managed to create of the SSS. He gets shot and killed and the Super Soldier serum mixes with him and something in the swamp. And Ted is reborn as Man-Thing,a creature who's touch burns anyone who is full of fear. Now for years people have called Man-Thing a Swamp Thing ripoff. But after doing some research it seems they were both created almost at the same time. Man-Thing was a great series that was full of strange trippy stories. Shit Howard the Duck first appeared in an issue of Man-thing. Sadly most of the great Man-Thing stories were all written by the late Steve Gerber. And now that Mr Gerber is dead,I doubt we will get any good Man-Thing stories.

Thanks to the comics code authority relaxing its rules on horror comics in the 70's Marvel attempted to take 3 horror archtypes. They took the Frankenstein Monster and gave him his own short lived comic. But sadly besides the great artwork by Mike Ploog the series isn't that good. Then Marvel took the werewolf and created Werewolf by Night. Which was actually a decent comic. The main star was a man cursed to become a werewolf. This series actually lasted for almost 50 issues. And is mainly remembered now cause it is where Moon Knight first appeared. Then Marvel took the vampire archtype. And created what is now remembered as one of their best series of the 70s. This was Tomb of Dracula. From 1972 till 1979 this series ran for 70 issues. Most of the run was written by Marv Wolfman and the late Gene Colon doing the artwork. What stood out to me about this series is that Dracula while evil was in someways the hero of the comic.

31 days of horror Year 3 day 26

Silent Night Deadly Night
1984
Anchor Bay Double Feature DVD Out of print

Since about the late 80’s I kept hearing about this little film. It was a slasher film that had Santa Claus as the killer. Well sadly none of the video stores in my area had it for rent. Well back in 2004 I saw that Anchor Bay put out a DVD that had Silent Night Deadly Night and the sequel on one disc. I put it on my wish list and that year got it from one of my aunts as a X-mas gift. Turns out I was lucky. This DVD went out of print pretty quickly. And since then only the first film has been released again to DVD. But that DVD also quickly went out of print. And now it has become an X-mas tradition with my cousin. Every X-mas eve or X-mas night we watch one of the 5 films in this series.

We start off on X-mas eve, and Billy is traveling to go see his grandfather. On the way back his dad pulls over to help someone that seems to have broken down on the side of the road. Well this is actually a robber who is dressed up as Santa Claus. And he proceeds to kill Billy’s dad. Then rape Billy’s mom.

We flash forward a few years and Billy and his younger brother are being raised in an orphanage. This orphanage is run by a group of nuns. And the head nun seems to hate Billy. She beats the hell out of him for minor stuff. We jump ahead a few more years and Billy is a young adult. So the head nun gets him a job at a local store. Billy seems to be doing pretty good, but his boss wants him to be Santa Claus at the store. This and the shitty behavior of his co-workers triggers something in Billy’s mind. Billy snaps and goes on a killing spree.

We get plenty of great kills. Like one where Billy spears a young Linnea Quigley on some deer horns that are on a wall. Another great one is when Billy sees some bullies stealing a sled from some kids. So while one of the bullies is riding the sled down a hill Billy jumps out and chops the bully’s head off.

The cops realize what is going on and realize that Billy is heading back to the orphanage to kill the bitchy head nun. But Billy manages to actually get into the orphanage on X-mas day. He is about to kill off the head nun  when the police show up and gun him down in front of all the orphans. The film ends with a close up on Billy’s lil brother’s face.

Now this DVD is the uncut version. And we get a warning before the film about how some scenes were taken from a print that isn’t as good as the main one used. So for some of the gore scenes the picture quality isn’t as good. But it is still pretty damn good looking. For extras we get a long ass audio interview with the director. Plus lots of press clippings from all the people that freaked out cause the film was about a killer Santa Claus. See when this film was in theaters some stupid ass women got so mad about it they started picketing the film. And it caused so much bad press that the releasing company pulled it from theaters. So very very few people got a chance to see it on the big screen. This is the reason that the second film is mainly  made up of footage from the first film. Strangely I have never heard about people protesting the second or third film in the series. But the film was popular enough that there is now 5 films in the series. I think only the first 3 got theatrical releases, the other two went direct to video. I would recommend for anyone that is a fan of 80’s slashers  to track down the movie. But both region 1 DVD releases are quite pricey and hard to come by. And I have heard that most of the VHS releases are cut. Silent Night Deadly Night gets a B+.

31 days of horror Year 3 day 25 extra film 02

Scarecrows
1988
MGM DVD

I have no idea how I didn't hear about this film till the early 2000s. When it came out on VHS I was renting like 6 or so horror movies every weekend. I started seeing posts about how good it was. So when the DVD came out I had to get it. Well I got it and it sat on the shelf unwatched until today.

We start off with a group of 5 people who have just robbed a military base of it payroll. They got 3.5 million and hijacked a plane to take them to Mexico. But one member of the group has other plans. He sets up a smoke bomb on a timer and when it goes off he throws the money outta the plane then jumps. So the rest of the group follow him out.

Well he lands in between an old graveyard and a cornfield. And goes off to find the money. He find it and loads it up in an old abandoned truck he has found. He is on his way out when the truck starts acting up. Well he goes to check the engine and there is no engine at all. He grabs two sacks of cash and takes off running. But being lost he ends up back where he landed. Some scarecrows attack him and gut him.

Well the other 4 make it to this old abandoned house that is right next to the corn field. One of the guys,Jack,goes to the roof and using his night vision scope sees where the money's parachute is. So they head out to get it. Well they get there and the money isn't there. So the guys head back to the old house. Not too long after getting back the guy who stole the money shows up. They beat the fuck outta him trying to learn where he hid the money but he wont talk. So they go outside to formulate a plan. And when they come back in the traitor attacks them. It seems like nothing will stop him. But Corbin manages to cut off his hand and head. Now with the traitor not attacking them they closely examine him and discover his organs are missing. They seem to have been removed and replaced with straw and money.

Two of the guys,Jack and another guy,go out to see if they can find the money. While out there Jack gets attacked by the scarecrows. They gut him and chop one of his hands off. Well the other guy sees this and manages to escape. This leads to this guy going nuts and the rest of the group heading back to the plane to get the hell outta the area.

Well for being done on a low budget this film does a bunch with very little. The various Scarecrows are well done and very creepy. The gore effects look pretty good. And the acting is decent. Scarecrows gets a B.

31 days of horror Year 3 day 25 extra film 01

Thinner
1997
Republic Pictures DVD

I read this "Richard Bachman" novel back when I was about 13. And back then thought it would make a fun movie. Well I missed the film when it first came out,but caught it on HBO later on that year. Until today that is the last time I have watched it,even though I have owned the DVD for years now. Saw it was airing on AMC middle of the day,and that prompted me to go dig out my DVD and give it a watch.

Billy is a fat ass rich lawyer. Who one night while driving home and getting head from his wife,accidentally hits an old gypsy woman. Thanks to him being friends with all the local cops and the judge he gets away with killing the old lady. Well her father shows up and brushes his hand against Billy's cheek ,then whispers "THINNER" into Billy's ear.

Well almost the next day Billy is losing serious amounts of weight each day. Very soon he goes to talk to the judge and finds out the old gypsy man has also cursed him. The judge is turning into some kind of human looking lizard. Well Billy heads out to find the old gypsy man and to get him to remove the curse. After confronting the entire band of gypsies at their camp,and getting shot thru the hand with a ball bearing,Billy calls on a old friend he knows through his work  to help him out.

This old friend just happens to be a mobster. Who goes and makes sure the old gypsy man is willing to remove the curse. Well Billy is almost dead from having lost so much weight,when he meets up again with the old gypsy. The gypsy removes the curse and places it into a pie. But warns Billy that with in the next few days someone has to eat the pie. They will die a quick death,but this will prevent the curse from coming back to Billy. So Billy heads home . And knows just who to serve the pie too.

Now I had completely forgotten how over the top every actor/actress in this film is. We get Joe Mantegna as the mobster friend. He with in the first 5 minutes hits almost every mobster film cliche. Then Kari Wuher is chewing all the scenery as the dead gypsy woman's daughter. Plus she is super hot in the film. I had forgotten that the guy playing Billy is also Cousin Micky on Rescue Me. The effects work,making him at first close to 200 lbs more than he actually weighs. Then making him look like he is barely 100 lbs is amazing. I also thought the twist at the ending was better than the one in the book. Thinner gets a B-.

31 days of horror Year 3 extra 04

Texas Chainsaw Massacre series overview

Now most people reading this know that I am a huge fan of the TCM franchise. The original film was the first movie I ever saw. I believe that the original is the first true American entry in the slasher sub genre.

Texas Chain Saw Massacre-Released in 1974 ,this film became infamous fairly quickly. It has been called the goriest film of all time. Which is strange cause there is very very little blood shown on screen. Now sure the film starts off with a disclaimer on how the movie is based off true events. And while I was living in Texas I met many many people who claimed to have seen the actually house this "real event" happened at. But this is all bullshit. The film was inspired by stories of Ed Gein that Tobe Hooper heard from relatives who lived up north. The pacing,camera work and acting in the film are almost perfect. This is not only my favorite horror film,but one of my favorite films of any genre. A+.

The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2-Released 12 years after the original,TCM 2 is in some ways the polar opposite of the original. In this film we get lots of gore and obvious comedy. Where as in the original we got not much gore,and the comedy wasn't so obvious. Too bad we didn't get Gunnar Hansen back as Leatherface. Originally when I saw part 2 I hated it. I thought the comedy was way to forced and didn't care for the over abundance of gore. But going back now I do enjoy the film. B+.

Leatherface:Texas Chainsaw Massacre III-The only entry in the series to not be filmed in Texas. Leatherface is ,in it's uncut form, a great film. We get some great acting from Ken Foree,Bill Butler and Kate Hodge. And the  family,who now has some new members,is extremely creepy. Lots of people seem to hate the little girl,who seems to be Leatherface's daughter,but I love how in the uncut version she is the one to kill Bill Butler. In it's uncut form I would give this film a A-.

Texas Chainsaw Massacre:the Next Generation-This entry was held up for years. It sat on the shelf for at least 3  years. The story I have heard is Matthew McConaughey and Renee Zellweger were trying to keep it from being released. Cause between when the film was made and when it came out both of them had become pretty big stars. Well I can see why they didn't want it to come out. It is a horrible film. McConaughey overacts and chews all the scenery. And Zellweger doesn't do much besides cry and scream. Some of the gore FX isn't bad. And really until the out of nowhere twist in the final 20 minutes the film isn't a complete waste. But then we find out that the Sawyer family is being aided by some secret government group. This makes no fucking sense at all and is one of the major reasons I hate this damn movie. F-.

The Texas Chainsaw Massacre remake-Released in 2003,this was the first of the big slasher remakes to come out. We get some great acting by R.Lee Emery and Jessica Biel.The gore FX are well done. Plus the changes to the back story are explained well. Sure it isn't as good as the original,but it is almost as good than parts 2 and 3. B-.

Texas Chainsaw Massacre:The Beginning-A prequel to the remake,this film seems to be better received than the remake. It is mainly a good film cause of R.Lee Emery. Mr Emery is the major highlight of the film. And shows that he should be considered as a new master of the horror genre. B.

31 days of horror Year 3 day 25

Phantasm
1979
MGM DVD

Back sometime in the mid 80’s , while working my way through the local video store’s horror section I discovered Phantasm. I had never heard of the film, but it quickly became one of my favorite horror films. So I was super excited when I heard that MGM was releasing it . Then word got out that it was gonna be loaded down with extras. On the day of release I went on my lunch break to go buy it. And watched it 2 times that day at work.

The film is about 2 brothers and their best friend. Mike is the younger brother . His parents died a few years earlier so his older brother Jody is taking care of him. But Mike gets the feeling that Jody will be leaving soon. So Mike follows Jody where ever he goes. Well one day after following Jody and their friend Reggie to a funeral, Mike sees the funeral director lifting up a coffin by himself. Mike tries to tell his brother about this but Jody just blows him off. So Mike breaks into the funeral home late one night and discovers that the funeral director, The Tall Man played by Angus Scrimm, is using the dead bodies to create this creature that looks kind of like  a Jawa from Star Wars.

Mike finally convinces both Jody and Reggie that something is strange up at the funeral home. All three of them go to the funeral home and find a warp gate. It seems that the Tall Man is an alien who is sending these Jawa like dwarfs off to another planet. They get found by Angus and the rest of the film is him chasing them. And the trio trying to figure out how to kill off the Tall Man.

This movie has a style of it’s own. It feels like someone filmed a nightmare. But it isn’t like the various David Lynch films that have the same feeling. Mainly cause after one viewing you can pretty much understand what is going on in Phantasm. Unlike Lynch films that require multiple viewing to understand what is happening. Now the DVD like I said before is loaded down with extras. We get a great commentary with the three main guys plus the director. About 10 minutes of deleted scenes. A interview with the director and Angus that is from 1979. The original trailer plus a bunch of radio and TV spots. A few years ago Anchor Bay re-released the film. The only real difference between the two releases is the MGM one isn’t anamorphic and the Anchor Bay one is. Phantasm gets a A.

31 days of horror Year 3 day 24

Club Dread unrated cut
2003
20th century Fox unrated DVD

This is the third film made by the Broken Lizard comedy troupe. I had already seen Super Troopers and loved it. So when I heard that Broken Lizard was making a spoof of slasher films I had to see it. But for some reason I didn’t go see it when it was out in theaters. But as soon as it hit DVD I rented it. Well I really enjoyed the film. Then flash forward to 2008. And I see that a store in town has the unrated DVD for $3. Well I didn’t own the first DVD release and was interested in seeing what was added back into the film. Well I picked it up, and about half way into the film the DVD froze up. So I tired it out on some other DVD players and it did it on each one. So the next day after work I took it back and got another copy. And this new copy did the same damn thing. So again I returned it. And the store only had one copy left. But thankfully this copy worked perfectly.

Club Dread is about a resort set on a private island. The island and resort are owned by a musician that is very similar to Jimmy Buffet. Someone is killing off the staff of the resort. We start off with 1 guy and two girls going out into the jungle to have sex. And right after the two girls take off their tops the killer attacks. All three of them die and we go back to a few hours before this. When a boat arrives with the guests and the new member of the staff.

We get a decent “who done it” style mystery. With plenty of suspects. The various kills are pretty well done. Plus we get a huge amount of comedy that helps the film out. Plus like all 80’s slashers, this film has an abundance of nudity. The cast is really good. We get all the guys from Broken Lizard. Plus Britney Daniel, Lindsey Price, Bill Paxton, M.C. Gainey and Jordan Ladd. Now I am not a fan of Jimmy Buffet’s music, but the Buffet style songs that Bill Paxton’s character does are all great.

This DVD has a load of extras. We get two commentaries. Each one has half of the Broken Lizard guys.  Both of them are funny and well done, the guys reveal all kinds of behind the scenes stuff. Also there is 22 deleted or extended scenes. This feature also has optional commentary with 2 of the Broken Lizard guys. And of course we get the theatrical trailer. Club Dread unrated cut gets a A-.

31 days of horror Year 3 day 23

Going to pieces: The rise and fall of the slasher film
2006
Thinkfilm DVD

This is a documentary that was based off the book of the same title. It premiered  in October 2006 on the Starz network of channels. Somehow ,even though it didn’t get the Starz channels, I saw it right after it premiered. And loved it. I had a VHS that I recorded it too. But until last year when Movie Gallery was closing I had no idea that a DVD was released. So I was looking around Movie Gallery for DVDs, and by this time all old stuff was down to a buck. I found this in the documentary section and from the rental records it had only been rented about 10 times total. I quickly snatched it up.

Going to pieces is about  the beginning ,the end, and the rebirth of the slasher horror sub genre. It does a pretty good job of explaining the origins of this genre that became super popular in the early 80’s. It says the normal thinking of “Psycho” and “Peeping Tom” as the prototypes of the slasher film. Then talks about how “Halloween” was the first slasher film to really become a huge hit. Sure there was slasher films before “Halloween”, stuff like “Black Christmas”,  “Texas Chain Saw Massacre”, and all the Italian giallos.

Then from “Halloween” ,we get interviews and various info about all the slasher films that followed in it’s wake. The documentary does a great job with combining interviews with the writers, directors and stars of the films, along with behind the scene pics and clips from the films. We also get lots of clippings from Variety that show us how for a 5 year period pretty much every slasher put out made big money.

Then we get a long segment on the fall of the genre. This is blamed on how the later 80’s slasher films were more about the gore FX and less about the story. Which I would  have to agree with. Plus cause so many films had been released in such a short period the audience got burned out on the genre. Then the backlash from certain groups didn’t help. We get clips from the infamous episode of Siskel and Ebert in which they say that all slasher films are demeaning to women. And Siskel even goes so far as to give out the home address of Betsy Palmer, who was the killer in the original Friday the 13th.  What I find strange about this backlash is most of the slashers had a strong moral message. Usually the people to die either had premarital sex or did drugs. Plus in most slashers of this era a female is the one that kills the killer in the end. This female has now been nicknamed “The final girl” by horror fans.

Then the last segment is about how in the mid 90’s the success of “Scream” brought the slasher genre back. And we get information about all the “Scream” clones that followed. To me this is the least interesting part of the documentary. Mainly cause besides “Scream” I never cared for any of the clones that came out.

The DVD has a decent amount of extras. We get a commentary with the producers and the editor. This is a fun informative track that adds to the appeal of the film. There is some bonus and extended interviews. Some of these are really great. My favorite is the one with the late Bob Clark. There is also a trailer and a pretty well done trivia game. The game has 3 parts, a true or false part, a novice part and an advanced part. I aced the true or false and novice parts. But some of the questions on the advanced part are pretty tough. If you are a fan of the slasher genre this is a great documentary. And I seriously doubt we will ever get a better one. Going to pieces: the rise and fall of the slasher film gets a A.

31 days of horror year 3 comics 02

Foul Play is one of the most infamous stories in the history of EC comics. Back in the 90s a company was reprinting lots of the EC stuff. Each issue would reprint one of the horror comics and also either one of the crime comics or sci fi stuff. I was picking up almost everyone of these. Cause I love all the EC stuff. Well one day in Chemistry class I saw that someone had left a comic in my desk. I look down and it is a issue of the reprint line of Tales from the crypt.

We start off at a baseball game.The score is tied. And a runner while sliding into the base spikes the guy on the base with his cleats. Well the next inning the spiked player gets up to bat and dies. Turns out he has been poisoned. Well the team figures out what has happened and invited the player that poisoned the other one to a special night at the ball park. They attack him and kill him. Then we get to some of the most gruesome panels in a comic that has ever been printed and given a major release. They use the dead players various bodyparts for the game. His arms and legs are the bats. His intestines are the baselines. And his head is the ball.

This story is one of the reasons Frederic Wortham started his crusade against comics. Some people say that with this story EC went too far. And it is pretty graphic for a comic that was out on the newstands at that time. Sure now we get stuff that is even more graphic,but that stuff only goes to comic shops and the owners known in advance about it. When I first read this I didn't know anything about it and was mildly shocked by it.Foul Play to this day is one of my favorite horror comic stories ever. Foul Play gets a A+.

31 days of horror Year 3 day 22

Murder Party
2007
Magnet DVD

This is another of the films that I got when Movie Gallery was going out of business. A good friend of mine had just told me that he thought I would enjoy it. So I added it to my Netflix rental queue. But the last day Movie Gallery was open, and old DVDs were only 50 cents each, I found Murder Party in the horror section. So I figured for 50 cents I couldn’t go wrong.

It is the Halloween night and in Brooklyn NYC some loser finds a invitation to a costume party. So he rushes home and makes a medieval knight costume using pieces of brown cardboard and heads out to the party.

He arrives and discovers that it is a trap. A group of art students left the invitation laying out in the street. That way someone they didn’t know would show up. They plan on killing this person and filming it. The cardboard knight is knocked out . Each of the art students has on  a great costume. And the art students argue over how they are going to kill him. But they are waiting on someone to show it. One of the students is accidentally killed by ingesting acid,this death is so well done and very gory.It is this mega douche bag guy, who seems to be the alpha male of this social group.

Well through some various mistakes the cardboard knight manages to escape. And the rest of the film is the various art students chasing him through the city as they try to kill him. We get to see the art students die some gruesome deaths. Plus some well done dark comedy.

The DVD has a nice selection of extras. We get a entertaining commentary with the director. A making of feature. Some outtakes and bloopers that are actually very funny. Then my favorite two extras. One shows you how to make your own cardboard knight outfit. And the other is a how to make pumpkin bread feature. This is a great film for anyone that loves dark comedy. Murder Party gets a B.

31 days of horror Year 3 day 21

Evil Toons
1990
Retromedia 20th anniversary edition

Back in the early 90’s I discovered this great video store about 20 minutes from my house. It was 50 cents for a week for old stuff, and a buck for video games and new releases. So usually every weekend I would got and rent 8 things. This place had a limit of 8 rentals per account. Well I worked my way through the horror section. Saw this movie titled Evil Toons. The cover made it out to be a combo of Roger Rabbit and a slasher movie. Well I brought home and loved it. So I made a copy and for years held onto that videotape. Sometime before I moved out to Texas I lost the tape and forgot about the film. Then in 2003 when I finally got high speed internet I started searching for the film.I saw that it was out on DVD, but of course that DVD was out of print. Then on a torrent site I found a laserdisc rip of it. So I downloaded it and made a DVD. But then a few years later that DVD-R died. Well my cousin kept wanting to rewatch the movie. So I was searching for a decently priced used copy. But found out that a 20th Anniversary edition was coming out soon. So I preordered it.

We got a pretty simple plot. 4 college girls have been paid to spend the weekend in an old house. They have been hired by Dick Miller. He wants them to clean up the house so he can sell it. They arrive there Friday afternoon,  and after some hard work they settle down to eat dinner. There is a knock at the front door. One of the girls answers it and finds a old book. The book is written in some old language, but of course one of the girls, the “nerdy” one who has huge breasts, knows this language. She starts reading parts of it out loud. This creeps the girls out so 3 of them head upstairs to go to sleep. One of them, played by 90s porn star Madison, stays downstairs. She is waiting on her boyfriend to show up. It seems that the parts the nerdy girl read have released a demon from the book. This demon is animated and looks sort of like the Tasmanian Devil. He attacks Madison and assumes her form.

The film continues with the demon killing off all but the nerdy girl. We get plenty of nudity. And lots of cheesy comedy. But for a 90’s era DTV b movie it isn’t bad. There is a few interesting things about the film. It starts off with  David Carradine hanging himself. And this DVD was released not too long after he died. Also there is 5 females in the cast and out of all 5 of them 4 of them either did porn before or after this film. The animated demon only shows up for about 5 minutes of screen time. But it is pretty well done. Also the book that the demon comes from, is well done and looks kind of like the nerconomicon from the Evil Dead series.

Now from what I have read the first DVD and the laserdisc release had no extras besides a trailer. This release has a commentary, a trailer, a making of feature, and an installment of Fred Olen Ray’s Nite Owl Theater. The print looks great, way better than the laserdisc or the VHS looked. And all the extras are fun. Evil Toons gets a B.

31 days of horror year 3 day 20 extra 03

Nightmare on Elm Street series overview


In 1984 a new horror franchise series was started. A small company ,New Line Cinema, put everything they had into this film. And when it became a hit ,New Line changed from being just a distributor of small cult films,into one of the bigger movie companies. This film was the original Nightmare on Elm Street.

Nightmare on Elm Street-Based off some articles Wes Craven had read about some Asian teens who were afraid to go to sleep,this film introduced the world to Freddy Kruger. Even today this original entry has some great FX and amazing set pieces. It is also one of the earliest acting jobs for Heather Langencamp and Johnny Depp. Overall the film is great. And if it wasn't for a really shitty ending it would be almost a perfect slasher film. But the ending,which is one of 3 filmed,is so bad it hurts the rest of the film. B-.

Nightmare on Elm Street 2:Freddy's Revenge-Rushed into production when the first film was such a runaway hit. It is now one of the most hated entries in the series.The writers ignore the rules about Freddy that were set up in the original film. And the acting is just goofy. I don't like the film that much,but don't hate it like most fans do. D+.

Nightmare on Elm Street 3:Dream Warriors-Made 2 years after the last one. This had Wes Craven and Heather Langencamp coming back. Dream Warriors is the first of the series I saw,and it is still my favorite. We get appearances from a young Patricia Arquette and Larry Fishburne.To me at least this one does the most work with the mythology of the film. And progresses the storyline the farthest.A.

Nightmare on Elm Street 4:The Dream Master-Part 3 was a huge hit and helped propel Freddy into the mainstream audience. So New Line quickly got to work on a sequel. While most people hate part 2 the most ,part 4 and 5 are the ones I hate the most. We get some OK FX. But most of the acting is pretty bad. C-.

Nightmare on Elm Street 5:The Dream Child-This was the first of the sequels to not make more money than the previous entry.We get a storyline that is a parable about the abortion debate.The FX is better than part 4 and so is the acting. But they both aren't enough to make this a good film. C+.

Freddy's Dead:The Final Nightmare-This was made 2 years after part 5. It was at the time New Line's final Freddy film . So they went all out.We got some great FX and the final 15 minutes or so of the film were in 3D.This is usually most fans second least favorite entry in the series. I personally enjoy it. Sure Freddy has become a borsh belt comedian. But it is way more fun than either parts 4 or 5.I enjoy how they kill off Freddy for the final time. B-.

Wes Craven's New Nightmare-Made 3 years after what was suppose to be the last Freddy film. But this film is a meta-fiction film. And I believe Wes was inspired by Lucio Fulci's Cat in the brain. We get a redesigned Freddy. And this new look for Freddy is great. He looks super creepy. Heather Langencamp comes back and has really improved her acting skills. This would have been the best way to end the series. A-.

Freddy VS Jason-Made almost 10 years after the last Freddy film. This is one that the fans had been wanting for years.And really the film is more about Freddy than Jason. We get a nice throwback to the cruel and evil Freddy of the early films. And less one liners. A-.

Nightmare on Elm Street Remake-Wow were do I start. First off for some unknown reason they replaced Robert Englund with Jackie Earle Hailey. Now Hailey is a good actor. And brings a great amount of sleaze and creepiness to Freddy. But when you think of Freddy you think of Robert. Freddy isn't like Jason,Michael,or Leatherface ,in that you can't really change actors.I saw this opening night,and as of now it is the second worst film I have ever seen in theaters. The FX ,which was mostly CGI was shit. The lead actors were horrible. And most of the changes to the story are bad. The remake is the only entry in the series I don't own. And unless it is given to me or I find it for say a buck I doubt I will ever own it. F-.

31 DAYS OF HORROR YEAR 3 DAY 20

Nightmares &and  Dreamscapes

2006
Warner Brothers DVD

This is the DVD collection of the short lived TNT original series. Each episode took a Stephen King short story and made it into a 40 odd minute episode. For some reason I never bothered to watch it when it was originally airing. And really had forgotten about it till this year. At Coast Con there was a dealer who had a nice selection of brand new DVDs for $5 each or 4 for 20. So I picked up this and 3 other DVD.

Episode 1 is based on the story "Battleground". We get William Hurt as a hitman. Who ends up having to fight off a group of green plastic army men. I am pretty sure this story is from the Night Shift collection. And I keep thinking it has been adapted before. Maybe on Tales from the Darkside or as a "Dollar baby".

The second episode is "Crouch End". We get Claire Folani and Eion Bailey as a couple on vacation in London. Who get lost and end up in a neighborhood that is very very Lovecraftian. This was one of my favorite short stories by Mr. King and the adaptation is well done.

Episode 3 is "Umney's Last Case". I am sure I have read the short story before,but didn't remember shit about it. William H. Macy is a writer who swaps places with the hard boiled detective he created. As always the amazing Mr Macy doesn't let me down.

The 4th episode is based on "The end of the whole mess". In which a guy's genius brother discovers something in the water of a small Texas town that makes people more peaceful. He replicates this and releases it onto the whole world. But there is a small side effect he didn't count on. A few things have been changed from the short story but nothing major.

Episode 5 is "The Road virus heads north". A famous author is on his way back home. And stops off at a yard sale and buys a painting. But the painting seems to be evil. This one has great pacing and conveys the emotions that the short story did so well.

Episode 6 is "The Fifth Quarter". Again I am sure I read the short story this is based on. But I don't remember anything about it or this episode.

The 8th episode is "Autopsy room Four". Which is about a man that comes too and realizes he is about to be given an autopsy while he is still alive. But he can't move or speak. Great tension filled episode. Well done and the ending is nice.

The final episode is "You know they got a hell of a band". A bickering couple on a road trip and make a wrong turn. They end up in the town of "Rock n Roll Heaven". Where it seems every dead rock star is still alive and working in the town. This is my favorite episode of the series. And it seems to be a word for word adaptation of the great short story.

As extras on the DVD we get some behind the scenes features. Interviews with various cast members. A few commentaries. And nice featurette on the FX work on Battleground. Outta the 9 episodes only one of them is truly bad. I wish this could have been a continuing series. Cause there is plenty of King short stories that would work great as 40+ minute episodes on basic cable. Nightmares & Dreamscapes gets a A-.